No F's Given - Another Marauder's RP w/Lynx - ABANDONED

"Nerves, just ignore it. It's going to be like that for a while." Rachel promised him as her mind went blank. "Fucking..god." She whimpered as he barely teased his finger against her core. The hint was more than enough to make her want and gasp. "I love you," she murmured. "I trust you to take care of me..."

Taking her word for it, Sirius just continued teasing her while he found all sorts of sweet spots on her stomach and plenty of ticklish places as well. Giving her mercy, a calm before the storm, he helped her be rid of her multiple lower layers, but he smirked as he grabbed her panties with his teeth, looking up at her with smoldering silver eyes, and he dragged them down to her knees before he finished with his hands, starting to kiss and lick up her inner thighs.

Rachel's trembling came back as he shocked her with the teeth at the panties. "Merlin fuck, that's hot." She muttered as he kissed his way up her thigh. Her heart and stomach suddenly felt like they weren't there and she was breathing shallowly, waiting in anticipation for him. She was naked, and he still had his trousers on. Not standing for that, and not wanting to be the only one displaying herself, she sat up and watched as he backed away, clearly thinking that she was changing her mind. "Let me help you take them off?" She offered, her voice husked with lust.

"Of course," Sirius had forgotten about himself and smiled sheepishly. Laying back on the cot he at least undid the belt, but allowed her to slide them down. Unlike her, he wasn't doubled up...and he was wearing a warm pair of boxer-briefs. "I usually go comando, but the winter is an exception. That's my extent of doubling up."

Rachel's tongue licked at her lips as she imagined their first meeting when she had tripped over the trunk and shook her head. "Now I know what to imagine when spring comes." She teased as she gently dipped her fingers into the hem of the underwear, smirking at his hooded eyes. She slowly took them off of him, but before he could switch, she pressed her hands against her hips. "I am good at one thing." She told him with a smile and with that, she kissed the tip of his cock and curled her tongue around the top, slowing taking him inch by delicate inch until she couldn't go any further. She might not be able to deep throat, she was confident in her tongue abilities.

"/Rachel/," Sirius groaned her full name, his head falling back. He let her do her thing a few times, reveling in it, but he soon grabbed her head and forced her off of him, shaking his own, "Not yet, though you could do that to slather me up before we connect," he purred promisingly, kissing her fiercely. He French kissed her for a time before using his dominance to his advantage and pinned her back down, "I am focusing on /you/ and you will /stay/, do you hear?" he rumbled, biting at her neck, though he was careful with the pressure. He was sure she had plenty of pain tolerance, but he wasn't sure if she'd be okay with a hickey.

Rachel let out a sharp cry from surprise and being tossed back into the bed. When he bit her neck, she let out a sharp gasp. "/Sirius/." She whined, instinct making her grip onto his hair. Not hard enough to pull for him to get off, but a nice grip where she assumed would be sexy for him. Her nails scratched at his scalp. "Okay. Okay. /Fuck/." She gasped after a moment. "Fuck..."

Sirius chuckled against her flesh, but then he made his way back down her body. He was faster this time, knowing a generous amount of her sweet spots. He skipped over her pleasure zone, however, and went back to her inner thighs, where he had been before. Sliding his hands along her skin, he got close to her before he pulled his fingers back again. He was sucking at the middle of her inner thigh a bit before moving on. Just when he got close enough to almost taste her, and then he switched thighs.

Rachel let out a whine that was very close to a keen. She wanted him to finish his torture and enter her already, but at the same time she was kind of surprised that he was taking so much time in trying to draw this out. She felt exposed, and even though her legs stopped trembling, she could feel the warm hotness in her abdomen coil that brought a shiver down her spine as he aroused her further. "/Please/." She begged breathlessly. "Sirius, /please/."

Not one to be that cruel, Sirius did what she asked and finally opened her legs as wide as the cot would allow, and he licked ever so slowly along one side of her folds, then the other, before swiping up along the center, growling at her taste and gripping her tight, "Mm...so sweet," he purred, "Is there anything you'd like me to do? Or are you at my mercy?"

Rachel wasn't certain, to be honest this was the first time someone had ever went down on her. "Mercy." She finally conceded after a moment. "I'll tell you if I don't like something or to do more of something."

Sirius went all-out, then, trying different tactics and ways of using his tongue, along with sucking. Her cries were beautiful, and he used them as signs he was doing a good job. Her scent was getting stronger, as well as the taste and the flow of her juices. Driving him wild, it was, and his cock bobbed against his stomach in excitement, pre-cum getting everywhere. He was determined, though, so he slipped his fingers inside of Rae's core to spice it up, listening to her keen louder. Curling his fingers, he felt for the spot that would make her crazy.

It didn't take long for him to curve against the spot that made her back arch and her hands clutch at the sheets below her, trying to shift her hips towards him to get him inside deeper. She could hear the squelching sounds of her wetness coating his finger even more. She would've been embarrassed, but Jesus Fuck did this man know how to turn her on, and how to drive her insane. "Oh fuck!" She groaned, his ravishing leaving her breathless and spell bound. "Sirius...oh mmm."

"There we go," he breathed, his voice vibrating against her clit, but in the process his teeth caught her and he pulled back, "Ah, I'm sorry..."

The shock of having being bitten had brought her to a close way to fucking fast and she knew it. She felt her cheeks rush in embarrassment for ending it so quickly, but she didn't know that it would be a turn of of hers to be bitten, let alone in somewhere so tender and after hearing his voice rumble against her. The shock on both of their faces, was probably comical at best at the revelation. "I...I guess you don't have to be sorry?" Her voice squeaked. "It felt good. Real good." Her cheeks flushed a brighter red.

Sirius chuckled and he slipped his fingers away, "I'm glad I made you feel good," he smiled and leaned up, kissing her cheek, not sure if she'd like tasting herself, "If you would like to taste me again I wouldn't mind...just don't do it too much. I'd like to cum with you." Since she already came once, it should be easier for a second because she would be sensitive.

She cupped his cheek with her hand and guided him to her lips. The kiss they shared was bitter sweet, her juices coating his tongue was a bit of a spark, but it was fine. She brought him closer, to her, still kissing him, as if she was trying so hard to pour in everything she was feeling into the kiss. When they pulled away, she barely nipped at his lower lip. "Then cum with me," She murmured. "I take protective potions, so you don't have much to worry about."

"You spoil me," Sirius rumbled, his body completely covering hers and he hiked one of her legs over his hip, his cock rubbing against her vagina, "I'll share a secret with you," he said as he nipped her earlobe, "You're the first girl I've shagged."

Rachel's cheeks flushed heavily. She felt a bit guilty that he wasn't her first, but at the same time she couldn't help but to feel proud. Proud that, Sirius was willing to make his sexual debut with her. "You're doing really good for someone whose a first." She murmured to him. "I'll keep your secret."

Guiding himself into her, he pushed inside and groaned. It was tight, but not in a way that was painful. So wet and hot inside...different yet the same as when he managed to pin Remus down. "Mm...this is amazing.../you/ feel amazing," he nuzzled her, and decided to take a nipple, teasing her until he got all the way to the hilt, to which he looked up at her, "How's that for you, Rose?"

Rachel was unable to speak for a moment, doing her best to let her body adjust to his girth and being entered. It had been a while, but wasn't awfully painful. "You're...thick." She managed to say after a moment. "I knew it, but I wasn't expecting it." She gave him a shy smile. "But if you move, I bet you're going to feel fucking fantastic."

Confident that she would tell him if it was too much, he took her nipple back and massaged the other while he pulled back and slowly slid back forward. With her cumming once at least she was extra slick, so it made things so much easier. The friction and the way her body gripped his made him shudder, and he pressed closer to her, rubbing his body with hers as he increased his pace a bit.

She brought her legs up and crossed them at the small of his back, using her thighs she pulled him closer to her and wrapped her arms around him since she knew that he liked to feel his lover's body underneath him. She kissed him filthily, letting the her tongue suck and swallowed up moans from either side. Her nails accidentally dug into his skin, but she wasn't too focused on it.

The way she kissed him made him grip her tighter, and he moaned deeply as she scratched him. With her leg position, he was ale to grind and thrust into her much differently and he felt his eyes roll back a bit as it rubbed places on his dick that felt fantastic, "Rose..." he breathed into her mouth, battling her tongue and sucking on her lips, even tracing her teeth with his own tongue.

She never felt like this, not with the other boy she was with certainly. This type of lovemaking, she could understand and see why a lot of the people said that it was fun, and easy to get addicted to. She doubted it would be the sex as it was the person who was on top of her. Her heart was thudding into her chest as she kissed him back, doing her best to keep up with him. The way he said her name, and the name that he gave her, brought butterflies into her stomach once again. She raked her nails down his back and when he pulled away from her mouth, she played with his ear, gently pulling at the lobe and kissing the hollow to trace her lips and tongue down his neck and leaving small, pretty love bites on to the skin.

"You seem to have a sense for where my sweet spots are," Sirius said breathlessly, rotating his hips before beginning to thrust again, "Mm...don't leave any lasting marks above the collar, my sweet," he hummed, "Unless you want people to know I'm yours...in which case..." he nipped at her own throat, "I'd have to do the same."

She was actually just a very good guesser, but she'd take those senses at best. In answer to his musing, she gently nipped at a pulse-point before sucking on it. If people talked, then that was fine with her. She wanted people to know that he was taken. She wanted Remus to know that she took care of him. She gasped loudly when he bit her hard in retaliation, thrusting her hips against his and sliding him in a little deeper into her, causing her to cry out.

"Fuck," Sirius groaned, "You okay? I don't want to hurt you," he murmured, licking at the red mark he'd created, "I love you," he whispered, "Rose..." the new angle and depth caused her to rub the base and bottom of his cock and e started breathing heavy, "Bloody hell...I could cum soon like this...you feel so good..."

"I love you," Rachel repeated, bringing her hands up to gently cradle his neck and down to his cheeks. "I love you. You can go a little faster. I'll catch up to you." She was certain she was right there with him.

Complying, he pulled away just a bit so he could re-adjust his grip, then he started pounding into her. Not too roughly, or too fast, but a nice deep penetration, and he groaned deeply when he felt himself hitting her deepest part, where there was resistance from her cervix. He hoped he didn't hurt her by going so far, but by her keens and moans he probably wasn't.

Her eyes practically rolled in the back of her head as she scratched and held onto him as he pounded into her deeply. She tried to adjust her legs, but she was starting to get exhausted from the pounding. He was pushing into her far and deep and it was so pleasurable that when she did hit her climax and she felt him pound a little faster and harder to reach his end, she was pretty certain that she had a minor black out.

When they both calmed down, Sirius had the blanket over them and was cuddling her with her back to his chest and nosed her hair, humming contently, "Bloody hell that was fantastic..." he said, his voice a definite raspy, rumbling purr.

She sighed, melting against his chest practically like butter on toast. "If we had more stamina, I'd say that a round two would've been possible." She certainly didn't have any energy what so ever to get up, let alone try to stand. "I need to come up with a nickname for you." It was random, but she was tired and sexed-out, her mind always went to crazy places when she was exhausted.

"Just what would you call me?" Sirius asked curiously, kissing her shoulder, "If you can't think, then it can wait for later."

"Hmm. Starlight's too cliche." Rachel hummed as she let out a breathy sigh at the soft kiss. She turned around to lay across his chest, nestling her head against his shoulder. She kissed his neck as she thought about it. "Nightlight's cute, Northstar? Oh Starshine's unique."

"Starshine works, I can roll with that," Sirius agreed, "I love you, Rose...go ahead and sleep. We'll be fine," he promised, rubbing her back.

"Good night, Starshine." Rachel murmured back, relaxing and falling asleep easily in his hold.

()

"You pick. I don't know very many songs that you could play on the piano, really," Bria admitted.

Remus nodded and after a moment his fingers were dancing across the keyboard with a soft, yet upbeat melody. It sounded like something that was from electronic or dance. It was a simplistic melody, but it was nice to play.

Bria immediately grinned brightly and started swaying her body in time with the beat of it, even bobbing when it fit better, then both. The piano was always such a calming instrument, and she could easily be put to sleep by it. There was no way she'd sleep right now, though. This was way more enjoyable. Remus looked to be enjoying himself as well, and she blushed a bit as he glanced at her, but didn't stop her in-place dancing, "You're really good. When did you start learning the piano?"

"I started learning when I was about five, but it was mostly casual." Remus said after a moment. "When I was eight and became a werewolf, I tossed myself into practicing since I thought that it would be all that I had. I knew about the stigma that they had in the wizarding world, and I didn't think that Dumbledore would allow one into the school."

"I'm very glad he did, or I wouldn't have met you," Bria murmured, "You wouldn't have such amazing friends, either." She watched his fingers dance across the board, and wondered just what else he could do with his hands. "What else can you do really good? Dance? Do you know many dancing styles?"

Bria laughed heartily, "That sounds like Sirius. Honestly, you should learn more styles. I can see you doing the fox-trot or maybe some more complicated ones. You are certainly nimble enough to pull it off."

"I wonder who will be shocked in surprise first, Sirius or James." Remus hummed. "Probably awful of me to say, but I wouldn't be shocked if you knew how to tango." His cheeks reddened, but he was smiling at the thought. She looked like a tango dancer, and heels would definitely make her legs look killer.

Bria matched him in redness, but a big grin spread across her face, "I've wanted to learn other techniques, but I've never had a dance partner or anyone to teach me. I only know the ballroom dance because it's the simplest one to learn. Rae is more of a techno fast-beat type."

"I bet her dancing will make Sirius cry and James laugh. I think Peter knows how to dance to those songs, Lily does for certain." Remus snickered, shaking his head. "Sirius has opinions about that, though who knows. He might just ask her to teach him how to do those types of dances if it makes his parents hate him more."

"Sirius seems like that kind of guy, yeah," Bria agreed with a giggle. She slipped from the stool and stood up to stretch since Remus' song had come to an end, "Would you dance with me? Sirius is probably complaining about nothing."

"Certainly," Remus stood up and took his wand out of his pocket. He did a gentle movement and the piano started to play a very old classical piece. He placed his wand away and held his hand out to her in offer.

Bria bit her lip shyly, taking his hand and enjoying the warmth that spread through her arm to the rest of her body. The way he was able to do that was always so amazing, and her breath even hitched as he pulled her closer. Immediately her hands went to their rightful places, one on his shoulder, the other resting gently in his palm. His hand on her waist was comforting, and she was really glad the music room wasn't cluttered on the floor, but rather spacious. Giving them plenty of room to do the spins and twirls necessary. Her heart pounded in her chest and she was entranced by his eyes, how gentle they were. His body moved with ease, and she felt like she was gliding across the floor with how he led her around.

It was comfortable, dancing with her. They moved like flowing water, without effort and with fun. She knew how to keep in time with her steps and watched him rather than their feet. She trusted him to guide her, and it made his chest feel warm and fuzzy. Moony was practically purring and pleased and he could see it in his mind eye.

Bria smiled warmly at him as she felt the soft, barely audible rumble in his chest. She wanted to compliment him on how he looked to her, to praise him for his dancing, but she couldn't bring herself to speak. She felt as though it would break the beautiful trance they'd fallen into. Sirius complaints about Remus' dancing must have been in play and didn't hold any truth, because this was fantastic. He made her feel so happy, and she hoped he saw that portrayed in her eyes.

The song that the piano was playing was nearing to it's end. The dancing turned into sway, just stepping side to side, and then they stopped. For the longest moment, they just stared at each other, his green eyes meeting and exploring her pale green ones. He carefully brought his hand up to cup her cheek before moving to the back of her head, towards the base of her skull and kissed her. His other hand moving to swipe his thumb against her cheekbone.

It was just so romantic, and Bria felt extremely lucky to have such a man in her life. Melting into him and humming appreciatively she wrapped her arms around his neck, toying with his hair while she kissed back. He felt warmer than he had been, though, and she wondered if he was alright. That was until he made his next move and she understood.

Remus gently parted her mouth with his tongue and the moment her tongue touched his, all control snapped. He gripped her back and he shoved her towards the piano, pushing her up and hooking her thigh against her hip, letting her feel how fast and sudden he managed to turn himself on.

Bria moaned deeply into his mouth but that was the best he would allow currently. Dizzy with the movement and the way his sexual appetite exploded, she ground against him more by reflex, and she shape and feel of his bulge had her whimpering. Her tongue fought against his, but he'd completely let go so he ended up pinning her tongue and making her submit. It was all she could do to hold onto his shoulders while he continued.

Once the kissing started to make his head cloud, Remus carefully stopped and started kissing his way down her neck. He growled when she tilted her head, allowing him to see the expanse of skin and permission to go further. Moony was happy, he could feel the wolf just underneath his skin, wanting to go all out. He couldn't bite her, he was too fearful that a bite would be bad, but small nips were harmless and he causally scraped his teeth along her jugular vein, feeling the pulse in his mouth. In a cliche, it made his wolf howl with pleasure at the sight of Bria's face.

Shuddering at his nips and the tease of his teeth, of what he /could/ do, she looked at him with half-lidded eyes, mouth agape and breathing heavily. Her conscious came up and she wanted so desperately to ignore it, but she instead leaned closer to him and caught his earlobe between her teeth, "Re-Remus..." she started, her labored breath catching in her throat, "Do you really want me now?" he did only just give them both the freedom to do what they felt the moment called for. She didn't want him to regret anything, for doing it too soon or anything.

It took a bit for Remus to pull away at her stuttering. “You don’t want to?” He was careful to stop, but keep touching rather than backing away. He had to remember that communication was key and that Bria was probably checking in for a change of mind or something.

She shook her head with a giggle, "It's not me I'm asking for. I know what I want. I just...want to know what /you/ want. If this is okay..."

Remus had to admit, it was fast and sudden. “I’m okay with it.” He said after a moment. “But I understand if this is fast. We did just agree to limit break on each other, and this probably feels more like desperation than it does an actual thing.”

Bria nodded, nuzzling him, "I don't...think sex on the piano would be very comfortable...or stable, for that matter." If anything could go wrong, it would. Kissing his neck, she pulled away to lean up and kiss him properly, "This isn't the best place overall. I /really/ enjoyed the make-out, and how you manhandled me..." her face heated, "I suppose that's a kink of mine...being used, dominated...we never did have our kink-talk," she smirked a little, "Another day, I guess. This has been...a wonderful date. I am sorry...though I guess we're in a mutual state of wanting."

"It's fine, it's probably best if we try to find someplace where we're less likely to be walked in on," Remus agreed. He kissed her gently but set her down away from the piano. "I don't think anyone would want to play the piano again after the stains we'd leave either."

"No, definitely not," Bria's face was red, but as she watched him she smiled, stroking his cheek, "I love you." He just looked much more relaxed, something she didn't see much, "Shall we go back to the Common Room together? Maybe work on homework? We do have tests before Christmas Break coming up."

"I'm sure Peter and James are going to beg for a peek at my homework too." Remus agreed. He brought her close to him so that they could walk out, side by side. "I love you, too."

()

“So I’m thinking an early Christmas Bash, the weekend before we all have to leave.” James said as he took a few cold cut sandwiches on to his plate. The Marauders, Raiden and Eri, as well as Bria, Lily, and Rachel were sitting together in a group in the Gryffindor table during lunch. Lily was heading home for the holidays and so was James.  Raiden was going to have Eri visit his family. Everyone else (“Lucky bastards,” James would say.), were staying at Hogwarts for the holidays. “It’ll be after exam week, so we can take a load off.”

"That sounds like a wonderful plan, pop," Eri beamed, "Where? In the Room of Requirement?'

“It’ll be big enough. I doubt we could hide away in the kitchens.” James hummed. “We can do a bit of gift exchange, or if we’re being traditionalists, we could do games of some sort. Maybe do a secret Santa and have a minimum amount we can spend since these are supposed to be small gifts to exchange. The big ones that we already bought and hidden are for the Christmas day.” He turned to Rachel. “Yule for you.”

Rachel merely snorted. “Christmas. Yule. Same thing. The birth of winter and snow.” She smirked at Bria. “The two things Bria hates.”

The brunette stuck her tongue out at her, then looked at James, "I love the idea of a Secret Santa."

"I would want to be a part of that," Lily grinned, "I do have gifts, but I can always buy another."

"But what's the spending limit?" Raiden questioned. "Since these are supposed to be small gifts."

"Probably no more than a Galleon or two. Maybe a few sickles. I don't want anyone to go up and over board with it, considering we got big gifts to look forward to. Candies and things are acceptable." James said easily. "I'd kill for a pack of sugar quills."

"I'd take sugar quills, too," Lily agreed, "I can always eat them in class which is fun," she eyed James, knowing he enjoyed watching her nibble and lick them into stubs.

"Chocolate wands, or licorice ones, as long as it's not black licorice," Bria beamed.

“Chocolate frogs, or anything with chocolate really.” Remus agreed with a slight hum.

“I’m not picky,” Raiden shook his head as he gently took Eri’s hand in his, running his thumb over the tops of it.

“That’s difficult.” Rachel frowned, tapping her finger to her lips as she thought about what she might want. “Something sour. Not chocolate though. I don’t like chocolate.”

Before anyone could comment or say anything further, an owl came by swooping into the Great Hall. It landed in front of Rachel, holding it’s leg out for her to untie the letter from it’s leg. Frowning, she did so and gave an owl a piece of bread to take in thanks. It flew away and James leaned over. “What’s the letter?”

“It says it’s from my father.” Rachel said as she tore it open. Her father never bothered to write to her in all her years of being here. No acknowledgements, not even during the yule season. She always stayed behind, so why would her father write now? She unfolded the letter and began to read it, the letter was simplistic, and practically pleading. Her furrowed brow suddenly started to lift and her lips went up. “You were wrong, Bria.” She said, her voice excited. “Your cards…they were wrong.”

Sirius watched as Bria paled and he felt his own stomach twist. What? Rachel herself said cards never lied. Just what the hell did her father write? He wanted to say something, but was this really the time or place? 

Bria's brow furrowed and her emotions were a bit more open, "How is that possible?"

“Look,” Rachel handed the letter to Bria. “He’s sorry. He wants me to come home. He’s sorry. Look, he even said that he’d get sober and help! Those are all good things, right? I wonder what made him finally snap out of it.”  

“So you’re-“ Raiden was cut off.

“I better tell McGongal I changed my mind,” Rachel hurried out of the bench. “And I should make sure I have my stuff ready to go after the get together.”

"Rose!" Sirius called, watching her run down the hall. He slipped from his place besides James, "I'm sorry, guys, I've got to go talk to her," he said before he tore after her.

Bria bit her lip and gripped Remus' hand under the table, "I don't like this at all."

"Me neither," James and Remus said together at the same time. Remus gripped Bria's hand back just as tightly to give her some sort of comfort.

Rachel was turning around the corner when she heard Sirius call out her name. She quickly spun on the ball of her foot to see him chasing after her. “Yeah?” She asked, her smile wide and pleased.

Sirius never wanted to destroy that smile. It was like her whole world had turned right-side up and nothing could be better. In fact, he wanted to be the one to make her smile that way. Unfortunately, he couldn't let this go, "You said the cards don't lie, Rose. I don't understand."

“They don’t,” Rachel shook her head from side to side. “There must have been a misinterpretation or something. Bria doesn’t always read her cards correctly, you know that.” She paused, and her smile gently faded from her face. “Besides, even the cards can’t predict the future. Not always.”

"The Home card was Negative," Sirius emphasized, "I talked to Mary and Timothy and they said Bria's cards weren't wrong about us. I don't think she reads them incorrectly, she's just not confident in her abilities," he shook his head, "I don't think it's a good idea if you go. Even the Summerfield's said your father's a prick."

Rachel knew he spoke the truth, but at the same time she felt like her heart wasn’t sure of what to do. Beat a thousand miles and cause her blood pressure to rise up, or break into a million pieces and have her stomach turn inside out. “I think otherwise. He’s getting help. He apologized. I would….I thought….why aren’t you happy for me? I get my family back, I get to have a dad again. You’ll be able to come over.” Why was she sounding like she was pleading with him? Rachel no longer knew where she stood. She felt…like someone else just overtook her and she was watching everything from the background.

"I want to be," Sirius said softly and held his hands up where she could see them, feeling like he was dealing with an easily frightened animal now, "Rose...I do want you to be happy, but my gut is telling me this is a bad idea. Don't go back."

Her heart decided to do both. “This is jealousy.” The minute it left her mouth, her head was filled with screaming. She was vaguely aware that she wasn’t supposed to say that, she wasn’t supposed to mention this, that this was the lowest blow that she could give, but it was like she was on autopilot now. If he was going to hurt her…she was going to destroy him. “I get a chance to have my dad back, but you don’t get any of those chances and so instead of feeling happy and encouraging me to at least try you’re telling me not to go. You want me alone. I thought you were better than that!”

Sirius was...stunned. Frozen to the spot, in his mind's eye he saw the glass quill his brother gave him in his dream shattering all over again. It was like all of his nightmares were on re-run and he choked, "I'm just...trying to protect you..."

She just threw her hands up in the air. “I can take care of myself.” She snapped. “I don’t need protection, I want…you know what? Never mind. Clearly you don’t care.” She turned on her foot and took off running.

 Everything was spinning. His world was crashing down around him. Her running away was like tunnel-vision. He didn't even see the other students going to and from. All he saw was his hand trying to reach out to her. What broke the spell was he heard Lily's voice.

"Bria?! Bria what's wrong?" Lily was across the table from the girl who was holding her head, so all she could do was reach across, but she looked up and saw Sirius's back retreating, "James! Go do something!" Something felt horribly wrong and she didn't know what it was.

James was already up from the bench and looked over to see Remus holding Bria tightly, rubbing her back. He bolted after Sirius, calling his name. “Sirius! Dude wait!”

Sirius didn't wait. He just kept going, eventually winding up outside. It was cold, the snow crunching under his feet, but he barely felt it. No one would be out here. Going to a secluded place around the castle courtyard, he stopped suddenly beside a bush and lost his lunch.

James slowed himself down, he knew better than to startle a sick person. He walked over and gently placed a hand on Sirius' back, giving it a good rub. "Hey." He muttered. "Easy there. Do you need the Hospital Wing?"

"No...no...just..." Sirius groaned, moving away from the bush and stumbled towards the bench, clearing it of snow with a wave of his hand, collapsing on it and pulling his feet up, curling into a ball, "They won't stop...my head...it's going around in circles..." he practically sobbed, "My nightmares...she had to say it...she knew what to say..."

“Hey shh.” James murmured getting on the bench and pulling Sirius onto his lap. He was certain that he was talking about Rachel, and undoubtedly there was a fight. “That’s a fucking low blow.” He said after a moment. “I’m tempted to either hex her or tell you to break up with her just for that. But I won’t make you decide now. You have better family than you know. You have me and mine, you have Remus, Peter, Eri, and Raiden. You have boatloads of family. You don’t need to take that kind of shit.”

It took a little while for the sobs to slow, Sirius using James' shoulder to muffle his screams. When he was able to gather enough breath through his hiccups, he explained the short conversation in the hallway. What James didn't know was that a lot of his nightmares /were/ of James, James' family, and his family of friends. "I just don't think it's a good idea...I was just trying to protect her..." he repeated.

James gently combed Sirius' hair with his fingers as he thought about what to say. Sirius was saying one thing, but Rachel was practically flying the other direction. "I  don't know what goes on in her house," James said softly after a moment. "But I believe you that it's not a good idea, and that you were trying to protect her. Still shouldn't have tossed that comment in your face though."

He could only shake his head, agreeing with James. A moment later he'd calmed a bit more and he pulled away, sniffing and rubbing his eyes before he gripped at his chest, "My...heart hurts..."

"We're going to get up, we're going to go to the dormitory and we're going to have a man cuddle." James said after a moment of thought. "Then, when you're feeling better, we're sneaking down to the kitchens and we're going to do whatever we can to make you happy. Fuck Rae."

Sirius could admit he was grateful for James to be mad for him, because he was just...so upset he couldn't bring himself to be angry at the woman he loved. All he did was nod, "Alright. I can agree to man cuddles and food," his smile was weak and lopsided, but he managed. Standing, he wiped his eyes again, "I heard Lily shout Bria's name. I hope she's alright...if Rose hurts Bria, then something is seriously messed up."

"Rae hurts Bria, then Rae gets a hex." James replied simply as he gently put his arm around Sirius' shoulder. "But enough about her. We have cuddles and food."
~+~
A soft knock on the door was all the warning that was given before Bria opened the door to the Ravenclaw dormitory, "The riddle was easy this time," she said softly.

“Hey Bria.” Rachel sighed as she tossed another pair of shirts into her trunk. “I fucked up with Sirius. It didn’t take me long. First I said “I love you” and then I tossed his family in his face. I started having a panic attack and dissociated myself. Again. I need to get back on my anxiety meds, or something. Anything so I don’t do that again. Doubt he’ll accept an apology.”

"He wouldn't unless you meant it...and I agree with him," Bria winced as she watched Rae's hands freeze on her next article of clothing, "You disassociated yourself because he's right. My cards didn't lie. I've known you a long time. /Met/ your own father. This is unusual. Something's up."

"You too?" Rachel turned around, tears in her eyes. "Is it a crime all of the sudden? To want to be happy? To give another chance? I've been scared of my own shadow! He's getting help. That gives me hope that I don't have to be afraid anymore! IS THIS REALLY A BAD THING?!" She slammed her fists down hard on the trunk's lid as she shut it down. "Leave." She said coldly. "Just...go."

Bria tried not to be broken so easily. They'd had a /similar/ conversation in the past, "You're in denial and that scares me more than anything. It's not a crime to be happy, Rae. Yet you know better. I had visions in the Great Hall. It was more than just my usual imagination. It felt real. It felt like what you describe to me all the time."

"It won't happen." Rachel said firmly. "He's changed, it won't happen. I may be in denial, that's true. But I like to think that I'm giving him a chance to redeem himself. He has that option. If he fucks up, then he won't have a daughter. I'll ask the Summerfields or someone to take me in."

"I have no doubt you will but I'd rather you not get turned into a bloody pulp to do so!" Bria snapped at her, tears springing to her eyes, "You've come over to my home like that more time than I was ever able to keep track of! He hasn't changed, Rae! He's conning you! He wants you back so you can't escape him!"

Rachel felt like she was smacked across the face. She felt like everything was starting to swallow her up. “Oh FUCK YOU!” She screamed. “YOU’RE ABANDONED AND ALONE. JUST BECAUSE YOU THINK YOUR NANA OR YOUR MOM CAN’T CHANGE DOESN’T MEAN THAT MY FATHER CAN’T! HE CAN AND WILL. HE APOLOGIZED!”

Lip quivering, Bria just shook her head and half-turned around, "Nana won't abandon you, though. She won't abandon any witch or wizard in need." She said as a hint before she left completely. While Sirius' nightmares overtook him, Bria's were a waking one, and she outwardly seemed rather calm. Too calm. She lasted all the way to the Common Room, but that was only because she felt like she was in a trance. If Rae's version of disconnection was feeling like she wasn't herself, then Bria's was blankness. Void of emotion all together. She ended up repeating herself to the portrait because her voice had been too hushed, but that simple raise of voice is what shattered everything. Walking inside she spotted the others and already had tears streaming down her face. "Remus..." she choked, begging, needy.

"Bria what?" Remus quickly got up and brought her closely into his hold. "Shh, sweetheart. I'm here." He kissed her hair and held her close. "I'm here."

Sirius looked at James as Bria completely broke down, her screams way more high-pitched than his had been, even muffled. "Don't hex her. It's not worth it." His voice was rather dead, if a bit regretful.

"Your right," James muttered. "My spell and attention isn't worth anything. A curse though, that'd be fun if I knew any of them." He watched Remus hold Bria tightly. "...You should consider breaking up with her."

"No. Not yet. Too hasty," Sirius sighed and reached for the tea Raiden had made them on the coffee table, "I'll wait and see what happens. She probably believes I have, which is good enough for the moment." If things turned out and she came back, the shock on her face would make him feel better. He didn't give up easy.

"She must be some girl," James sighed softly. "But I'll keep her away from the party. I'm sure she's not going to go, but...regardless."

"Thank's James," Sirius nodded and took a sip of his drink. Only time would tell what would happen next.
()
Everything….hurt. It hurt to drag the damn trunk, it hurt to stand up straight. Her bones ached and she was certain that if she did stand up straight she’d lose everything from her stomach. She could feel blood drip down her head, her nose and lips. Her head was spinning everywhere in different circles, from clockwise to counterclockwise and back again. Her arm felt broken, she couldn’t use it to drag her trunk and anytime she moved it, a sharp knife-like pain would shoot up to her elbow.

She finally got to the kerb of the street, and she felt…defeated. She walked only to the corner and far away from her home. She was thankful that it was the nighttime and mostly everyone was eating dinner. She pulled out her wand and remembered what Bria said. Without any other hope, she held her wand out and with a loud BANG a purple bus appeared and the doors opened.

“Hello Nana,” Rachel said weakly. “I’m sorry.”

The woman driving the bus was a burly and somewhat heavy-set who was only in her fifty's. Her hair was in a boy's cut, and she wore glasses that flashed light onto her olive-hazel eyes. She gaped at Rachel and stood up to come help her, "Honey! You're a wreck! I'm so sorry it had to be this way," she hoisted Rae into her arms while flicking her wand to make the luggage float, carrying Rae to a bed. Noticing how limp and twisted her arm was she sighed and held her down while she flicked her wrong, wincing as she cried but everything was set back in place, "There you go. Don't worry, I'll get you to the Leaky Cauldron and contact Dumbledore."


"Thanks...." Rachel curled up on the bed, cradling her still hurt arm. She knew better than to expect a smooth ride, but she was still going to lay down and try to keep the nausea and the dizziness out of her head. She felt the bus jerk and she whimpered again as she felt herself hit against the bruises. She caught her reflection in the pole and she wanted to laugh.

Her lip was split, she had a black eye and a gash across her forhead. Her cheek was swollen and she had red hand marks against her neck. Her clothes were torn, as if she just got out of a fight. Her skirt was ripped and she hadn't had time to get on any pairs of pants. Her blouse was covered in blood. She knew that if she lifted up her shirt, she was going to find huge bruises on her stomach and ribs. She was certain that her legs were probably covered in them too. She closed her eyes.

She was going to go back to Hogwarts and she was going to be safe. Her heart sunk a little at the thought. Sirius and Bria were undoubtedly going to see her...and when they did see her they were going to say those words. They were going to tell her that she should have listened to them.

And who was she to deny that?


"We're here," Nana said as she put the bus in park, not even caring. This was personal and /her/ bus so she would do as she damn well pleased, "You just stay right there. I'll be right back," she told her, going inside the Leaky Cauldron. It took at least ten minutes before she returned, one of the workers accompanying her. She reached down and helped Rae stand, "Shh, I know you hurt. They have a healer and medicine to help you feel better, honey. It'll all be okay. Dumbledore will be here in the morning as well and you'll be on your way to Hogwarts in no time at all. Bria will be happy to see you. She wrote to me what happened. You know she'll take you back with open arms. You're her sister."

Rachel just wanted started crying. She wanted to go home, she didn't want to be in so much pain. She wanted to be safe. She was gently taken inside the Leaky Cauldron. She wasn't aware of what really was happening. Just that she was in good hands and she was on a soft bed. She could hear the chunk of the trunk hitting the floorboards and she looked up to see Nana about to leave. She wanted to beg her not to leave, but she knew that she had to be brave. She was going to be brave. She closed her eyes and....fell asleep.
~+~
Morning came with a flash. Dumbledore came by and helped her with her trunk and guided her to the fireplace. He asked her questions, but her mind was numb. The healer's did a good job. The bruises weren't too bad now, and looked like a few days old rather than fresh. There were still hand marks on her neck, but she was okay with that. She still wore the horrid uniform, having yet the time to repair it. Her arm still ached, but it was more or less phantom.

She was certain she answered Dumbledore here and there, but her mind was elsewhere and her voice sounded too soft. Mostly from her father's insanely tight grip...and how she was kind of surprised that she didn't break her windpipe. Instead of Hogwarts...she was brought to a warm home. She whimpered when she saw Mary and Timothy and was immediately brought into an embrace.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Rachel cried into Mary's shoulder. "I want to be home."

"Honey you're home and safe." Mary promised, cuddling her tightly to her body. "You can live here. God knows you deserve to be here. Let's get you out of those clothes and into a nice bath hm?" She looked up at Dumbledore. "Thank you for bringing her here."

"Not at all," Dumbledore smiled though sadly. His poor student. "It seems that she'll be better off with you. I'll make sure that all addresses are changed accordingly. I'd suggest adopting her through the Wizengermot."

"We'll talk about it," Mary promised, looking at her husband. They certainly will adopt her if she had any say in it.

It was that odd time between Christmas and the New Years. Rachel had come to live with Timothy and Mary permanently - they were working on the adoption papers - two days prior, and it was the morning of the 28th. Tim strode into Rae's room, letter in hand and fingers smudged with ink, "Alright, I have your letter written and my owl is ready to fly off when you approve it, my little Goldie-Puff," he grinned at her as he sat beside her on the bed. He'd written it since she was still favoring her arm, "Shall I read it to you?"

“Please?” Rachel asked, her smile bright. She closed her book and scooted to the edge of bed, leaning against him so she could read along to what he was going to say. She felt like a little girl, looking for a bedtime story, and it felt…so nostalgic and safe. She was so happy that she was going to be here from now on.

Clearing his throat, he put his "Professor" face on and straightened the parchment, "Dear Bria,

Persephone has frozen Hell over, but she is safe now where she truly belongs and it is thawing out slowly. I miss you, love you, and hope you can forgive me. I plan on coming to Hogwarts tonight or tomorrow, as I am feeling much better than I had been. I will talk to you when I see you, if you will have me back.

Regards, Your Rae."

“Yes.” Rachel smiled, though her sadness showed in her eyes. “That’s perfect, thank you…dad.” She was still trying her hardest to get used to saying those words to them. Even though both Mary and Timothy told her that she didn’t have to, especially since her mother meant a great deal to her, Rachel still stubbornly did her best to call them that rather than their names. She firmly wanted to be in their family, and showing it as well as she could.

Tim reached out and stroked her hair tenderly, "I'll go send it now. You just relax and prepare for going back. I'm sure Bria would love to see you," he assured for the millionth time, but he didn't mind. Standing, he waved and folded up the letter, going to find his owl.

~*~

Bria recognized the flying bird coming to her during lunch, and reached up to take the letter, giving Ernie a piece of meat from her sandwich as a gift before she tore into the paper. "Sirius...it's from Rae," she said to the black haired man on the other side of her, as she was squished between him and Remus. They'd become each other's comfort the last week when Remus needed a break from being suffocated, hanging off of each other in-between classes so much Remus had gotten questions if they were a couple.

He and Remus slowly stopped eating, and he frowned, "What's it say?" he murmured. James nor any of the others were here, so it was just the three of them. The werewolf put his arm across both of their backs and he leaned into Bria.

"It was a set-up," Bria murmured, "He hurt her badly, but she's safe with Tim and Mary. It says she'll probably be back tonight or tomorrow."

Remus took a breath. "On a scale of one through ten, what does that phrase mean?" He knew that "badly" had a range. He felt...heartbroken for Rae. To fall for a trap like that. He agreed wholeheartedly with Sirius and Bria about her decision, and how they mourned. Still, he felt bad for her. Especially since she was injured.

"Twelve," Bria muttered, "If I have to give a number, but there really isn't one," she folded the letter up, "Of course I'll have her back. It wasn't the first time we had the argument, really. It hurt seeing her willingly go into what could've been her death more than her words."

It made Sirius sick at how...nonchalant Bria was about it, because it was /normal/. "I'm...very happy she's alright. I'll take her back, too. I think I have a little longer to wait before she comes to me, though..."

"What will you do if she doesn't come to you?" Remus couldn't help but to ask. It was a legitimate question, considering the fight that happened between her and Sirius. "How long will you wait?" He brought an arm around Bria and held her close. He felt...awful. A twelve. It was probably a good thing, that Rae hadn't come back to Hogwarts. If Sirius saw the wounds, if Bria saw...he could imagine that both of them would be on a murder spree.

"I'd be heartbroken, but I'll wait as long as I have to. She'll have to see and talk to me sometime. Bria's my friend now, too, and I'm your second mate to Bria, so it eventually loops around," Sirius shrugged, "All I can do is try my best."

Remus nodded, but didn't say anything more. It was fair, more than fair, but he knew that Rae was a dirty fighter. Her stubbornness streak was probably twice as strong as Bria's, if not more. "My guess is that she'll come by tomorrow. Tonight wouldn't be optimal unless it was late and she was able to unpack rather than go to dinner."

"She just might use dinner as a way to get around everyone else and the crowd," Bria concurred, "We'll just have to wait and see I guess."
()

The next day, Rachel was heading towards the library, enjoying the empty hallways and the lack of people going to and for classes. The hallways echoed with her steps and she hummed softly underneath her breath, a small skip in her step. She needed to finish an essay for the charms teacher, she needed to work on a couple of her spells for DADA since she knew that she was out of practice and needed to get reacquainted with her wand. She also wanted to find something to read that wasn’t in her meager stack of books at home.

She did have half of the mind to go through Hogsmade, since she was living there now and go through the Scroll and Tome to find anything of interest. The library, however, would be easier to gauge and interest in a book or series before actually buying it if it was worth the money. She turned the corner and stopped short. Remus, Sirius, and Bria were heading down the same hallway. She glanced at her still bandaged arm and shifted it, before taking a deep breath. She could be decent. She could say hello. They got her letter, she apologized, and stepped forward boldly.

Remus had just been laughing at something that Sirius had said, remembering the moment too fondly when he heard footsteps. He glanced up and blinked. He glanced over at Sirius and Bria before looking back at Rae. He decided to be referee, just in case something went wrong.

“Hello.” Rachel said, but the false cheer in her voice gave her away. “Nice day.”

"Rae! Hello, how are you?" Bria asked, eyes brightening as she saw her friend. She made sure not to make any sudden movements, but she did look her up and down, taking in anything that might be out of the ordinary.

Sirius didn't say anything, keeping in the back and even shrinking a bit. Would she even talk to him? He doubted it. His heart had leapt at the sight of her, but the last several days he had been feeling weaker, so he just gave her a meek wave of his hand.

“I’m okay.” Rachel smiled, though her heart ached at the sight of Sirius’ wave. She gently gestured to her arm. “Having to keep this in a sling.” Remus wondered how long that fake smile was going to last. It was clear that she was in pain to him. “Heading to the library.”

“Studying?” Remus questioned.

Rachel nodded, “Didn’t get much done when I was at home.” Remus noticed that she was tugging on her sleeve. Sine when did Rae ever wear long sleeves. “I didn’t mean to disturb you, just thought I’d say hello.”

Bria frowned a bit, before she smiled again, "Do you want to accompany us?" the code phrase had been awful and she wondered how much of her injuries had healed.

"You can always find a different table when we're there," Sirius gave her an out, "Just at least until we get to the door."

“I can stay for a bit.” Rachel answered, little surprised that Sirius spoke to her. “Are you three studying as well?”

“We left homework unwritten and James is going to be throwing a New Years party when he comes back. We decided not to do the Christmas thing,” since things went sour, but Remus wasn’t about to put blame on anyone.

Rachel already felt it and she shrunk back. “I see…sorry to hear that.”

"Come on, then," Bria waved for her to follow, "It's not much further." She turned around and started back down the hallway, grabbing Sirius' arm to tug him along. Remus was a neutral force, so leaving him behind wouldn't be too bad.

Rachel followed them ambling behind, quiet. She watched Bria tug Sirius and how Remus was just walking along as if he was used to this. She was starting to think that maybe sitting with them was going to be a bad idea. However, she did commit herself to this.

"Do you have any New Years plans, Rose?" Sirius asked over his shoulder.

Besides hiding away? "No." Rachel answered, shaking her head. Her voice was oddly soft though. Remus was kind of reminded of a dog showing it's belly in submission.

"Would you like to come join us?" Bria asked curiously, giving her a hopeful look.

Join…them? Rachel could see how badly this was going to go. She was fairly certain that the only person who was wanting her to be there was Bria. Everyone else would probably allow her in out of politeness. “I…should think about that.” She said after a moment. “Maybe.” She didn’t want to give too much away and just say yes. It’d make her look desperate…and she was fairly certain that all she’d do was cause drama.

“Have you written the potions essay yet?” Remus asked Sirius and Bria, switching topics. He didn’t want Rae to feel pressure, but he also knew that this was starting to become uncomfortable. It was more tactful to end some of her discomfort at the very moment, rather than carry on and have her freak.

"I'm almost done with it. I've been getting a lot of headaches lately so it's hard to concentrate," Sirius shrugged.

"It helps that you're my potion's partner, but yes," Bria smiled up at Remus, "I just have to double check it, since I'm paranoid."

“It helps that you’re good at potions,” Remus laughed at Bria. “The essays I can handle, but actually making them, that’s an issue. Probably due to how good I can smell.” He turned to Sirius. “Have you seen to Madam Pompfry about your headaches? They’re way too frequent not to go and say something Sirius…especially since they get so bad you get sick.”

"You help me a lot with the measuring since fractions were never my friend," Bria nudged him, but at his comment for Sirius she looked at the black haired man with concern, "It'd be good if you got them under control before classes start again."

"I know," Sirius sighed, pinching his nose, "I'm just stubborn I guess. I'll go see her later if i get another one," he promised.

“Lavender helps.” Rachel said from behind them, tugging on her sleeve again. “It’s good for migraines and headaches.” Her voice was still soft, and when Remus glanced over his shoulder, he noticed that she was a good distance away from them. She was still being close, but…he was starting to see that she was probably going to leave them.

“For persistent headaches and migraines?” Remus questioned curiously. Rachel didn’t respond, just tugged at her sleeve and shrugged one shoulder up. He supposed that it was a maybe. “It’s an idea, but…I’d feel better if it was Madam Pompfry.” They entered the library and everyone knew to lower their voice as they started looking for a table. “I still have to do McGongal’s essay, what are you going to be working on?”

"History of Magic and Transfiguration," Bria wrinkled her nose at the last one, "HOM is easy enough, it's not done mainly because I was working on the rest. I never did really like Transfiguration, like Eri."

"What do you need to do, Rose?" Sirius tilted his head at her, "We can help you, if you need it."

“McGongal never does the easy essays.” Remus agreed as they found a table and sat down. Rachel picking a spot across from them as they had decided to sit side by side together. She crossed her ankles and started swinging them as she started looking through her bag for her own essay for charms when Sirius spoke to her.

“Just Charms…” Rachel murmured, quietly getting out her things. “Charms and history of magic. It’s easy, I…” She trailed off, and shook her head mutely.

Remus frowned deeply. It was so clear that Sirius was trying to get her engaged, but Rachel was backpedaling every time he opened his mouth. It was…no longer about submission. It was like she was waiting. She was waiting for something to be said. He remembered Sirius telling him, Peter, and James that it was good enough if she thought they broke up. It sure seemed like she thought that they were. Every conversation he opened, she shut down quick and fast.

Maybe this was starting to become cruel. Then again, what she said to Sirius was cruel in it’s own right too. He looked at Bria, a bit worried. This wasn’t a ground he was good at keeping stable, considering he didn’t know Rae. Not as well as Bria did.

"Leaving the easy ones for last," Bria nodded, though she wasn't entirely sure what to do, either. Sirius appeared to be waiting for something as well, but he was sure he wanted to be alone with Rae. Rae wasn't about to be alone with either of them, though. Taking a breath, she decided to sign while Sirius' head was down, /"I am glad you're okay, and that Timothy and Mary took care of you. Persephone must have been devastated."/

Rachel watched her sign and she felt her heart shatter and break. Her mom would be devastated about what just happened. Tears welled up and without warning she started shoving everything back in her bag as fast as she could. She was certain that she might’ve accidentally broken an ink pot, she heard something crunch. She swung her bag over her shoulder and paused before signing. “/She would have destroyed hell and never returned. I’m alive, but I’m far from “okay”./“ With that, she turned on the ball of her foot and left and left quickly so she didn’t have to respond to any questions.

Bria's jaw dropped and Sirius had just popped back up from fishing in his bag. He stared, "What...happened?"

"I was the cause of that one. I didn't mean to..." Bria bit her lip.

"Bria told Rae that she was happy that she was okay and that Tim and Mary were taking care of her. I believe the sign she used was for Persphone and that she would have been devastated. Her response was that they needed a stronger passcode because Persphone wouldn't have frozen hell, but destroyed it." Remus paused translating and said carefully. "She said that she may be alive, but she's far from okay."

Sirius bit his lip as well, and he knew more now that he didn't want to break up with her. He didn't want to in the first place, but seeing her so tormented hurt him more. He had felt it reverberate to him, and just wanted to run after her and hold her, but she would just shove him away. Sighing, he put his essay on the table as well as the potions book, his ink and quill already ready. "Let's just...study..." he muttered.
~+~
After the whole scenario, Rae was no longer seen alone. It was kind of funny, in a way. When James and Lily came back to start working on the New Years party that was going to happen that weekend, James didn’t let Sirius alone either. Every time they walked down the hallway, before James could pull Sirius away or do something, Bonnie was already dragging Rae towards a longer route to wherever that they were going.

Remus was starting to see a horrible effect that it was having on both parties. Sirius’ nightmares skyrocketed and Remus did his best to cuddle with his friend and Bria had to take over too. Rae looked pale and always looked to the ground the moment she caught eyesight with Sirius. Her sling was finally missing, but he could tell that she was still aching in places. Sometimes, he could smell fresh blood though that could be from anything.

What was even better was the pursed lips James gave when Remus had to tell him that they invited Rae to the New Year Party. “Do you honestly think that’s a good idea?” He asked after a moment.

“She may not come,” Remus admitted to James. “But at the same time, I think she’s punished enough. She’s hurting herself more than you and Sirius could ever hurt her put together.”

“I don’t know why Sirius won’t break up with her,” James sighed, tossing himself on the bed. Sirius was downstairs with Bria, getting all the warm cuddles that he could get from her.

“I think that out of everything,” Remus said after a moment. “Rae may be the one to make that move instead. She was hurt…really badly James. We don’t know the extent, but if I read between the lines, I’m gonna say she nearly died going home.” He paused. “I can imagine that she’s hurting and feeling lonely. Sure, we try to extend our hand of friendship to her, but…after what happened I can’t blame her for looking at us like we’re about to strike. She’s probably just waiting for it, biding her time.”

“She hurt Sirius,” James snapped.

“I’m not denying that, it was shitty of her to do so.” Remus soothed James. “But…she went home James. She went home, and came back. Sirius is done. He wants this to be over, and he wants to talk to her. She did her time, James. Honestly, I think this is a bit of an overreaction. She panicked, she felt alone and attacked. What do you do? Take it or leave it? She went home thinking the best of someone. To be frank, I’m impressed by that. I’m impressed that she loved her father enough to give him one more chance. The way she went about it, I’ll again admit was horrid. But at the same time, we’re not faultless either.”

“I’m shocked you’re not telling Sirius and Bria this.” James muttered.

“I don’t think they need to hear it. I think they’re suffering enough.” Remus said simply. “But you’ll hold that grudge because you love Sirius and Bria. You’ll do it for them, and I want you to stop. To let it go. This isn’t your fight…it’s theirs.”

“So she’s going to be at the party then.” James sighed. “Do you even think that she’s going to have fun?”

“I sincerely hope that she has at least a small smile on her face by the time she leaves.” Remus said softly. “I hope that she does have a small bit of fun.”

“Fine.” James sighed loudly.

“I knew I could get you to agree.” Remus beamed.

“You just keep talking and never shut up, I was bound to agree sometime.” James rolled his eyes playfully. “So do I tell Sirius and Bria I don’t care or…”

“Just..leave the invite as is.” Remus smiled. “I’ll go down and cuddle the two love bugs. Heaven knows they don’t get enough.”

“I’ll come down.” James jumped off the bed. “Sirius probably wants my cuddles more than yours.”

“Of course he does, cuddle-master.” Remus teased.

~+~
Bonnie sat down on Rae's bed and scooted close to her friend, putting her head on her shoulder. Rae was reading a small book that appeared to be from J.R.R Tolkien. It always amazed Bonnie of muggle books. How pictures didn't move and the artist's magic wasn't in the way the eyes would dart from side to side but the emotions that the artist would put into the illustrations. It was amazing to her to see how muggle artists were able to capture a beautiful city that looked as if it belonged in the wizarding world, but it was actually a muggle thought.

"What book are you reading?" Bonnie asked as she read the first paragraph on page 103.

"It's called Children of Húrin." Rachel replied. "It's a bit of a difficult book to follow since it's about the world Treebeard walked through in Lord of the Rings the Two Towers."

"Huh. I should borrow it when you're done." Bonnie hummed. "It's small, so I think I could read it pretty quickly."

Rachel merely laughed as she turned the page. "I'll let you borrow it."

They stayed in silence for a moment before Bonnie pulled away from Rae's shoulder. "Have you thought anymore about that New Year's Party? You don't have to go, you're in no way obligated to go."

"That's coming up," Rachel frowned, setting the book on her lap, her finger marking the page. "I probably should...I should try to at least mend some of the bonds."

"I don't think so," Bonnie frowned in response. "They basically abandoned you when you wanted them the most. You sent them a letter, telling them that you were sorry and that you were hurt and what do they do? Not send a letter back and start treating you like you must be fine?"

"In my defense I did say that I was doing okay."

Bonnie glared at her heatedly. "You had your arm in a sling, and I'm sure you were still walking funny. You jump at loud sounds and you can't stand it if someone raises their voice higher than what I'm doing right now. Your anxiety attacks only made those bruises worse and I heard you scream in your sleep. Yet they have the audacity to think you're okay. Honestly, ditch the party. They don't care. They only invited you probably because it makes them feel better to pretend that you're not hurt and in pain."

Rachel merely looked down at her knees.

"And let's face it, how many times do you stick your neck out for Bria? You go above and beyond for her, and she can't be bothered to do the same thing? And don't get me started on Sirius. If he was going to break up with you, I'd thought for sure he'd be less petty about it instead of leaving you to question about whether or not you're even in a relationship. Like honestly? Don't go to the party, and deny that they were even your friends. Because that kind of friendship and relationship is toxic and you don't need it." Bonnie frowned at her, and then immediately felt bad when Rachel started crying. "Oh...oh dear..." She gently brought her into a hug. "Shhh."

"I'm lonely," Rachel whimpered into Bonnie's shoulder as she hugged Bonnie tightly. "It's my fault. I fucked up everything first. I told Sirius that he was jealous...same with Bria. I said some really awful things. I'm....really fucking lonely. I'm really awful with people."

"Shhh..."

"It's so easy for Bria to have friends because she's able to talk to people. She's able to get out and about and not have to worry about herself. She's the outgoing one. She's the one that can get people to have fun. I'm basically the fucking counselor, the holder-of-problems, go off and have a panic attack else where because no one wants to see it." Rachel coughed and let out a whine. "I'm lonely, Bonnie. I'm really, really lonely. Even if we're not friends anymore, I still want to try. I still want to say I tried."

"Shhh, shhh." Bonnie gently stroked Rae's hair. "If you're serious about going to the party I'll come with you so you won't feel attacked and lonely." She told her softly. "They better be so sincerely thankful that you have a Catholic's heart, because honestly...I would've just cut them off after this." She pulled away. "Bookmark that book and let's go play some cards by the fireplace. You're shaking like a leaf and I know you're cold."

"Okay..." Rachel murmured as she pulled her book to her and marked it. She set it aside on the bedside and allowed Bonnie to help her up off the bed and drag her down to the common room so that they can play by the fireside.
~+~

A gentle piano melody played from the corner. Nothing too harsh on the high notes, but it was a good tune to sway and maybe dance to. Remus and Bria had been, but Lily thwarted their attempt by conjuring a bushel of mistletoe above their heads and flashing the camera she had gotten for Christmas from her parents. Now they were making out, and Sirius just had to smile tenderly at the scene, a pang in his chest. He wished Rachel was here so he could do the same. Unfortunately, even if she was, she wouldn't want him. That made his chest hurt even more, and he shook away the flashes of nightmares before they could disrupt his good mood.

He glanced over at James who was handing a star with his wand, trying to get it /just right/ on top of the tree, "Almost there?" he called. It was a mixture of New Years and Christmas since the get together had been a bust, what with moods being low from the events. They had a small table of food and drinks with some wrapped up sparkling wine James had smuggled in. Nothing too harsh, since they wanted to stay up until Sunrise, but enough of a fizz for when it hit Midnight. He was glad for cleaning spells, as he would hate for Lily's and Bria's dresses to be ruined.

"Just a bit," James replied as he managed to get the star on. He stepped back, smiling appreciatively that he managed to get it after the third try. That damn levitation spell, it was tricky when precision came to play. "Now I got it," he turned back towards Sirius and watched Lily as she moved across the floor. She looked...downright gorgeous with the blue dress. It showed off her shoulders and collarbone, giving only the slightest hint of her chest, and not enough to give a peek. It was modest and straight-lined, but oh did it flatter her body beautifully. "Damn." He said after a moment. "Hey Evans." He called over to her. "Save me a dance for the new year yea?!"

Lily pointed the camera up at him and snapped a picture before she pulled it away and grinned at him, "Of course! Just no sneaking me under the mistletoe," she stuck her tongue out at him playfully.

Shaking his head at the playfulness, enjoying how Lily was making James ecstatic by being so flirty and open with him, he jumped when he heard the Room of Requirement doors open.

Bria had been giggling at the lipstick mark she'd left on Remus' cheek when she heard it, and she took a deep breath, grinning brightly as she saw Rachel come through, Bonnie as her escort. Bonnie wasn't dressed for the occasion, just in casual clothes. Rae looked gorgeous, though, and she pulled away from Remus, her hand still attached to his, "Rae! You came!"

Bonnie's lips curved into a smile, and Rae shyly just waved. She was...gorgeous in a long sleeved purple dress that reached all the way down to the floor. When she walked, only a hint of her dark black heels would show when she kicked up the skirt. The collar only showed her neck and a slight tease of her collarbone. On her waist was a dark black sash that was tied around in a double bow.

Her eyes left Bria’s greeting and fell on Sirius’ incredulous look. She tugged on her sleeve, like it wasn’t long enough to hide whatever it was that she was still recovering from. Bonnie seemed to notice this, because she quickly grabbed Rae’s arm. “You lot did great with the decorations.” Bonnie whistled. “I wasn’t expecting Christmas trees.”

“Yeah, well…” James shrugged. He promised Sirius that he wouldn’t make a scene if Rae somehow, someway came to the party. “It’s kind of a double party.”

“Damn,” Bonnie blinked in surprise.

“We didn’t think you were going to make it,” Remus told Rae still smiling from the kisses and the lightheaded feeling that he got when he was with Bria. He allowed Bria to escort him over to her. “You look gorgeous.”

“Thanks,” Rachel murmured.

"I swear Bria just wore that lipstick just to give you those kiss marks, Moony," Lily laughed as she came over, and she outright hugged Rachel, ignoring Bonnie. "I'm glad you came. I was sure you would, and so was Bria. She even brought some of your favorite foods in hopes you'd eat something," she pulled away and offered a blue bag, "Your Secret Santa. Bria put your name in that way it'd be a fair draw when we all pulled from the jar."

Sirius knew what Lily was doing. Since Bria was too shy and skeptical of Rae's feelings to say so herself, Lily was putting to light the things Bria did since she left their group. He turned back to the piano, honestly not up for the looks Bonnie was giving him the whole time.

“Oh…” Rachel looked shocked that she was included. She glanced at Bria and a soft smile was on her face. She took the bag and carefully opened it. “I’m sorry. I didn’t get to draw or anything, so I don’t have anything for anyone.” She smiled fondly at the candies that she could see that were nestled in there. “Thank you.”

Bonnie shifted her attention away from Sirius to the bag. “Is it just candies in there?”

“It’s a bit heavy to just be candies,” Rachel agreed as she carefully opened the bag further and pushed the candies to the side, being careful not to crush or smash any of them. Sugar quills, peppermint toads, even a package of sour straws. “Oh…” she picked out a shrunken dream journal. “Bonnie you-“

Bonnie took out her wand and muttered a quick spell, bringing the dream journal to it’s original form. It was a gorgeous brown leather journal with a gold clasp. On the cover was a drawing of the Tree of Life. It was clear that whoever got her the journal and candies was aware of her Wicca and how she felt about it. “Aw, and you were just bitching about needing a new one.” Bonnie laughed.

“Hmm.” Rachel nodded, clutching the book closely. “Thanks again, for putting my name in.” She told Bria sincerely. “I wasn’t expecting it, nor getting anything. I’m just sorry that I came empty handed.”

"We still have the jar in the dorm with the name that didn't get pulled," Sirius offered from his corner, though didn't glance behind him.

"If you want, tomorrow I can give it to you," Bria promised, happy Rae was happy, "That's a gorgeous journal, though. Lily showed it to me before, but I don't care," she giggled and reached into Remus' back pocket, pulling out another shrunken journal, this time it was a blue, purple, and green stained glass Mosaic design about it, "This one you can use just as a new diary. Happy...belated Yule."

Rachel's eyes suddenly sparkled in mirth. "I thought it was the boys who put their stuff in women's purses, not women putting things in their men's pockets."

"It gave me a reason to grope his arse, too," Bria quipped, causing Lily to snort and Remus even choked a little.

"Always with the sexual harassment." Rachel turned to Remus. "You ever want a break from her wandering hands, you have a friend in me."

"It could've been worse, she could've put it in his front pocket," Lily snickered.

Rachel's mouth hung open and then she paused. "Well...it'd be the first time someone would actually managed to discreetly grab a dick.”

Sirius wanted to quip and comment, but he bit his tongue and shrunk even more into the piano, managing to keep tempo and the gentle melody, but only barely. It was fun listening to them, he reasoned with himself. Since Lily broke the ice as well, he didn't want to ruin things. He'd stop when he got hungry...but with the way things went, he might not even move away from his bench and would ask James to fetch him something.

The party went on like a dream. Rachel was guided to the food and they ate. She managed to make a few more sexual comments with Bria, and got Remus to laugh a few times. James took a bit of work, but he managed to give her a good grace. She still stuck with Bonnie, but she was starting to come out of it, closer and closer letting all of the weight drop from her back. Midnight hit with a loud chime and James had gotten up on the table, and popped off the wine. Rachel and Bonnie both shrieked in laughter when they were splashed and Lily got him back with her own bottle, causing him to gasp dramatically and look at his clothes like they were ruined.

It made Rachel laugh harder and Lily pump her fist up in victory. The wine was passed around and she was sipping her own cup, watching the couples. Remus and Bria were dancing and Lily and James were attempting to. More or less James was doing his best not to be dripping wine all over her since he did managed to get wet.

The piano stopped sounding like someone was physically at the bench and instead started to sound like a melody from a music box. Rachel glanced over at the piano and noticed that it was empty.

It was a whisper, but a soft voice spoke behind her, "Bonnie isn't watching you like a hawk at the moment, so I thought I'd see...if you would dance with me?" Indeed, Lily had spun away from James only to take Bonnie into a sweeping dance.

Rachel took a breath in, and her body stiffened like he was holding a wand to her back. She turned around slowly, wondering if he was going to look away from her. When she faced him, she felt her heart shatter. There were dark circles underneath his eyes that was covered by just a light bit of make up, clearly Lily’s idea. His posture indicated distress, but the way that he was holding his hands into his pockets and fidgeting…didn’t match the man who could stride into a classroom, flick his hair, and have girls swoon at his feet.

She was staring at a man just as unsure as she was. The fight rang fresh for them both, and she…didn’t know what to say to his invite. No? Yes? What was the right answer? She kept her gaze on him, refusing to look away. Refusing to let him disappear. She did this to him, the wounds that he had on his heart bleeding for all to see…she did that. “I’d like that.” She said after a moment, carefully holding out her hand, palm up like she was afraid of scaring him.

Sirius looked genuinely surprised that she would agree. He had been expecting her to turn him down, if albeit in a polite way. He gave her a small but happy smile, and reached out for her, heart beating wildly in his chest.

Only to snatch his hand back as a screech filled the room. His middle finger, being the longest digit, just /barely/ brushed her own in a flick. It almost felt like a hot brand and he curled his hand into a fist out of pain, stuffing it back in his pocket and looking up to see Lily chasing after Bonnie.

Rachel felt like her veins in arm were set on fire and it made her arm ache, reminding her that even though she was out of the sling she still hadn’t healed. Bonnie quickly got in front of Rae, pushing her behind her. “What the hell?! You ignore her and then you think it’s okay to just walk up her to and ask her for her hand? /Really/ Black?!”

“Bonnie…” Rachel murmured in shock, she touched her friend’s shoulder, but was shrugged off.

James couldn’t believe it. Out of everyone to suddenly snap, he thought it was going to be him. Not…Bonnie. Then again, he noticed the looks that Bonnie sent Sirius’ way. He frowned deeply, but waiting to see how far that this was going to go before jumping to Sirius’ defense. It was quite clear that Rachel didn’t ask for an intervention.

Remus was also pursing his lips into a thin line, unhappy with this turn of events. He held on to Bria’s waist, just so that he had something to anchor him and not lose his mind in anger. What the hell was Bonnie thinking?

"Excuse you, Mason?! Just who do you think you are?" Lily demanded, getting between Sirius and Bonnie.

Bria's eyes widened and she leaned into Remus, her hand over her mouth. Lily? Lily had comforted her while James comforted Sirius, sure, but she hadn't exactly involved herself, either. It was quite shocking to see her stand up to the other Ravenclaw.

Bonnie raised an eyebrow at Lily, just as surprised as Bria to see her standing before her. “I’m telling Sirius to back off, Lily.” She said, folding her arms across her chest. “He can’t say two words to her and now suddenly he wants her? I let my best friend get hurt once, I’m not letting it happen a second time when I can prevent it.”

"What are you, a blind house elf?" Lily put her hands on her hips, "Sirius hasn't come near Poe this whole time because of /you/. Besides that, can't you tell just how heartbroken this man is?" she waved her hand back, "Better yet, how heartbroken Poe is? They're both absolutely miserable without each other. He's kept his distance because he doesn't know just how the fuck she feels about him. He doubted she wanted to touch him or even be near him. If she didn't want to be, then wouldn't she have run to you? That's why you're here, to be her bodyguard?"

Bria blinked slowly. Lily swore, and Lily never swore.

James was also impressed, completely taken aback by Lily’s vehement defense. He wasn’t sure if he was supposed to step in, or sit back. He decided to sit back. If he needed to break something apart, he could. He could see Remus’ looking startled from his prepherial vision.

“You could call me that,” Bonnie snapped, folding her arms. “Considering your friendship is all about “let’s hide everything underneath rugs and closets and let’s not talk about it”.” At Lily’s look, Bonnie plowed on. “Let’s think about this, Lily. Rae sent a letter telling them that she was hurt but she was going to come home and hoping to find forgiveness. Instead of getting a letter back or any acknowledgement that she was even hurt or even forgiven, they start talking to her like she’s some sort of statue. Only asking relevant questions to make her look like she belonged, and that she was a place holder than a person. She came back here, thinking that someone was going to care. But instead, she had more backs turned. I watched her crumble into anxiety attack after anxiety attack, I watched her give herself new bruises because she couldn’t handle the thought that people couldn’t like her anymore. DO you EVEN realize what damage you did to her. You do not call her a friend….and then walk away when she’s hurt. You do NOT give her a sentence with your back turned and then think to yourself that’s okay. That’s she’s alright. Your worried about her reactions? My god. Either you think she’s an Ice Queen, or you don’t know how to handle her. And if you didn’t know how to handle her, where was the questions? Where was the “What do you do?” Bria’s not with her twenty-four seven and let’s be honest, her methods of cheering someone up is sometimes painful to watch.”

A slap and several gasps echoed in the Room of Requirement. Lily had hit Bonnie with such force she snapped her head to the side. When she turned back, mouth agape, she flew into a flurry of Sign that was just as fast as Rachel's. Sirius could only catch pieces and Bria was barely able to keep up, "Maybe you will both understand this better. Every story has multiple sides. That she says that, Nightingale, disappoints me and upsets me that the only one she knows is yours and you didn't tell her what you said. Maybe you did, but then that means she doesn't understand and that makes this worse."

Lily paused to run her hand through her hair and sigh, but then she jumped back into it before they could interrupt, "Poe told Sirius and Bria they were jealous but it affected both differently. Bria's is abandonment. Pie said that while Bria will never get her mom or grandmother back, she at least had her father. Bria was trying to look out for her, keep her from walking into a trap. They say love is blind. Because of that Poe threw Bria's concern in her face. What hurt her was that rejection, not the comment about her parents. Bria felt abandoned by Poe. It is not Bria didn't want Poe to be happy. They grew up together and you said Bria isn't with her 24/7? Then why in the bloody hell are they called Mirrors, or even twins? Why is it that the Slytherin house fears and respects both? I think it is /you/ that is not with her 24/7. Why was it not /you/ that was accepted into the Marauders? Where were you when Poe gave private readings in the abandoned classroom? /Where/ have you been /until now/, Bonnie?"

The green fire that glared at Bonnie could be considered terrifying. What was worse was the dead silence that had filled the room for way too long. Lily knew how to use it to her advantage, and it was much scarier than yelling and screaming. Lily continued, "Something tells me /you/ are the jealous one, and you want Poe to yourself. You hated how Sirius and Bria make her happy. Now here you are, making it next to impossible for either of them to get close. Bria has wanted to hug /her sister/ and you are holding her hostage."

Lily was far from done. Her Sign wasn't even slowing down. "Sirius has been hurt Spiritually as well as Emotionally. Sirius is acceptance. Poe said her father accepted her where his family never would. She used the information from his dream journal and tore him to shreds, much worse than she did to Bria. I used concealer makeup to hide the dark circles under his eyes. I have caught him not sleeping for three days straight. You complain she didn't get a fucking owl back? The letter she wrote said that night or the next day. Why write an owl when you get to see her face to face? Oh but then, Poe didn't seek them out. They were shocked to suddenly hear her behind them in the hall because they didn't know when she came back to school! They weren't prepared, and had already been talking among themselves like they fucking /have been/ for a week! Sirius had been awake two nights already!"

Bria noticed James was fidgeting because he didn't understand Sign and being quiet for so long was nerve-wracking. Tugging on Remus she guided him over to the young man, "I knew Lily could Sign but not like this. She swore again, too," she offered.

The bitch-out was slowing down finally as Lily wrapped it up, "Bria noticed. She noticed and told me all of the problems Poe had outside of her arm, and was very upset about the limping. Why didn't she say so and why did she say she was glad she was okay? Nightingale, you should be ashamed of your reaction because /you know/. She even used the code in her Sign to throw Remus off. /No one else but her and now apparently Bonnie knew/. You would have been so upset if Remus or Sirius found out so she kept quiet to make sure you didn't get uncomfortable or explain something you didn't want to. Yet you blew up in her face anyway and Bonnie became your bodyguard. I can't believe how ungrateful you are."

Another sigh, "I couldn't just hold my tongue anymore. They're my friends, too, and I won't stand for them being punished for something they didn't do wrong."

This time the responding smack was just as loud, and James nearly threw himself in the middle but Remus held him back and shoved him to the side. Everyone's eyes widened. It wasn't much that they were surprised that Bonnie would respond with violence, but that they were actually about to watch a cat-fight. "How dare you." Bonnie seethed, her eyes glinting angrily. "Not only did you accuse me of being jealous, but you accused me in general. Let me tell you something Evans, I don't want to be apart of the Marauders. I held her hostage? Are you fucking kidding me? I don't recall asking for a ransom." Bonnie didn't stop there, she plowed on. "You must be the greatest judge in the world, Evans. To decide what mercy and compassion is. You hear one side of the story and you stick with it. I see you. You fucking snake." She turned towards Rae. "I honestly am starting to think that they'd think their lives were better when you were unknown to them."

Rachel just watched Lily's incredulous expression and Sirius. She glanced over at James and Remus who were tensed up, ready for anything while Bria was chewing on her fingernails. She looked back at Lily, over Bonnie's shoulder. "Not only did it take a fight, it took a mouthpiece to tell me everything." Rachel stared at Lily in wonder, in awe...in absolute despair. "I don't know what I'm supposed do with any of this information."

"Ignore it like they ignored you." Bonnie said snidely. "Because it's not like they're listening, they're just looking for a show."

Suddenly Rachel laughed. She dropped the bag with a resounding sound and covered her face with her hands, shoulders shaking. Both James and Remus looked at each other with complex expressions before turning back to the fight. She was laughing, and everyone was wondering if she was going to explode or what. Finally her shoulders stopped shaking and the laughter died down. She stayed like that for a moment and when she pulled away, she was wearing a smile, but she was clearly on the verge of tears. "I...I'm so bad at reading in between the lines. I didn't think that the invite was just a formality and that I was expected to decline it. Should have been my first though, so I'm sorry for ruining another lovely party, James." Rachel said sincerely to him. "My intention was to try to make amends. Though I'm aware that too is just a formality, I just wanted to at least say I tried." She took a breath and burst out laughing again, a single tear slipping down her cheek. "I deserved this. I deserved all of this. It was cruelly kind of you to play the part until midnight though. Wow..." She laughed again. "This is...so fucked up. I'll never deny that this started because of me, but...wow..." She bent down and picked up the bag. "If this is a game to see who can hurt someone more, congratulations. You win. You fucking win." Another tear slipped down her cheek and they started falling faster. "I don't want to be in this game anymore." Without another word, she took off, and Bonnie attempted to go after her.

/"Petrificus Totalus!"/ Lily snapped, her wand appearing from where she'd put it on her forearm, held there by the tight dress. Flicking the wand she watched as Bonnie's body froze and snapped together before she fell onto her side and then onto her back. She watched as Rachel leave before she turned to Sirius, "Go after her. She'll listen to you, of everyone. Even Bria." She waved and Sirius hesitated a moment before he started walking to the door, gradually going from a jog to a run before he was bolting around the corner. Lily walked over to Bonnie and looked down at her, "You just stay there and think about things. You picked one story and stuck with it, as well. So we we're both guilty of that. I however, know everything that was said and done. I wasn't aware of Rachel's suffering. I can only judge on the facts I am given, and see for myself. I saw Sirius and Bria suffering, and James and Remus suffering second-hand. That was all I was concerned about, and they were being bitched at unfairly. Anyway, thank you, for ruining a perfectly good party. In actuality, this was your fault. If you had let things be and play out, this wouldn't have happened." With that, she stood straight and flipped her hair before she smiled at James sweetly, "Let's clean up, hmm? We can always go to the Astrology Tower to see the sunrise."

"You're beautiful when you're terrifying." James said after a moment, looking at her in both awe and in admiration. "I can handle the astrology tower, do you two want to come with us?" He asked, turning to Remus and Bria.

“I think it’d be fun to see the first sunrise,” Remus turned to Bria. ‘But this is up to you, do you feel up to going?”

"We have five hours until sunrise, and it is cold up there. Let's go to the Common Room for four and drink tea. The last hour we can spend there," Bria suggested.

"Sounds good to me," Remus laughed, gently putting an arm around Bria's shoulder and hugged her to him in comfort.
~+~
Rachel could hear loud footsteps coming behind her as she turned another corner blindly. She was pretty certain that it was Bonnie who was behind her, but after a little bit she noticed that the footsteps were too heavy. Bonnie had a different type of stride. It made her pause, clutching the sides of her dress until her knuckles were white and she could feel her hands tremble. She hadn’t expected alone to follow her. What more could they possibly say? What more was there to say? She was tired. She was exhausted and she turned around, about to tell the person off, about to plead with them to stop bothering her, when she saw that it was Sirius.

He looked…frazzled. Still tired, still under stress, and she could see that he was just as nervous as she was becoming. Out of everyone, he was the last person she thought would follow her. Bria might’ve. Remus could’ve. James was second to last, and Lily…it depended on a bunch of scenarios.

"Rose..." Sirius panted softly, "Rose...please...will you hear me? Will...will you hear what I have to say?" he begged, Adam's Apple bobbing. He just...had so much on his chest and he wanted her to listen, "You don't even have to say anything. You can just walk away. Just...hear me."

Rachel nodded, still unable to unglue her tongue from the top of her mouth. Her heart hammered in her chest. Was this a goodbye? She wasn't sure...if she could handle that right now, but...he wanted her to listen and she wasn't going to deny him that. Not when she denied him everything else.

Sirius breathed heavily now out of emotions, "I love you." That was the first thing out of his mouth and she watched her have a mixture of reactions just by her face. "James wanted me to break up with you. I refused. At the time, I just wanted to see the reaction on your face when I said you're still my girlfriend." He shook his head, "Now...now I just want to see you smile. I saw a flicker of it earlier. It made me sad to see it disappear. That's all I've ever wanted, was you to be happy. We worked so hard, only for all of this to happen and destroy everything. I don't want it to be that way. One of the first nightmares was that one of us in the hallway...and it just shattered like it was reflected in a mirror. I don't want it to be that way!"

He shook his head venomously, "I hear what everyone says and I just know that's only half at what I feel! What you said earlier is wrong, too. None of it was a formality! All of us, except perhaps James, wanted you there. Bria and I wanted to hug you, talk to you, make things better, but Bonnie was intimidating. I felt like a cornered animal, stuck at that piano. I wanted to just leave half the time. It was obvious I wasn't wanted. I will be honest, I did expect you to turn me down for the dance. Yet I was so very happy when you said yes, and then Bonnie stormed over and I thought 'why did I even bother?' because I just could feel deep down before I approached you that that would happen. I never wanted to lose you. I know you're hurt, and I'm sorry. I couldn't lie to your face, though. After what everyone has told me, I could lie and tell you I was happy for you. I was scared. I was scared for you and that I would never see you again if you went because he would keep you from coming to school. Then...this all blew out of proportion and I lost you anyway."

Sirius was practically sobbing by this point, "I've had so many nightmares. I can't sleep. My heart hurts. My whole body is sore from not sleeping. Remus has been telling me to go to Madam Pomphry but how can she heal a broken heart?"

Rachel said nothing. Her heart swelled when he said that he loved her, and then shattered at everything else. By the time he was finished, she was sobbing and and practically flung herself at him, running into his arms and hugging him close. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. I know nothing I can say will fix this, I know I fucked up. I’m sorry. I didn’t want your lies, I just wanted you to love me.  I’m sorry I hurt you, I’m sorry I fucked you over. I’m sorry. I’m really, really sorry. I thought we were over, I thought I crossed the line. I wouldn’t have blamed you, I would’ve deserved it. Damn it, I’m sorry. I’m sorry and I love you too. I love you and I fucked up and I’m sorry.” She took a deep breath and tried to herself together, but it didn’t happen, she just sobbed again. “I’ll tell you everything…everything…just don’t go. Don’t leave me alone. I don’t want to be lonely anymore. Please don’t go. I love you. I’m sorry.”

"I love you...I forgive you..." Sirius whispered into her ear. With her so close, wrapped around each other, and her words, he just felt...everything falling away. The edges of his vision was turning black, and he thought he gripped her tighter but he was starting to slip. Sliding them both down to the ground, he groaned and swayed, "I don't want anyone...to be lonely..." he said but it was barely audible. He was aware of her saying his name, but then there was nothing.
()
A few days later, Sirius was released from the Hospital wing and Rachel’s bruises on her stomach were finally starting to clear up. They were relaxing in the middle of the abandon class room. She was leaning against his chest, and he was holding her tightly. While she wasn’t used to the clinginess, she hugged him and held him as often as she could. Only when James was around did she keep her hands to herself and to her sides. She was breathing in his scent, listening outdoors to the soft snow that was falling down and the fire place crackling merrily before them.

She had spontaneously made a picnic. She made sandwiches and cool-aid. She made sure that there were crisps and vegetables and fruits that were easy to feed to one another if they felt romantic. It wasn’t much, but she was trying her hardest. She knew her actions were probably out of character, but…it felt nice to do this. She felt nice smelling his scent and being wrapped in his arms. Sometimes, she’d suddenly tense when his arm would go to her peripheral  vision and sometimes she flinched when he moved just a bit too fast, but she tried her best not to let it bother her. Her heart hammered in her chest however. "This is nice..." She murmured. "I should've brought music. That's my oversight."

"The silence is wonderful, though. Everyone's been coming back so things are loony," he hummed and stroked her hair, "Would you allow me to show you something? From my past? Or would you like to leave it be for a while longer?" They had agreed to have a heart-to-heart about their family life back in the hospital wing, but they also agreed to wait until they both felt better and ready.

She took a breath and nodded her head. “I think it’s time.” She admitted after a moment. “Only if you want to though.”

"I've been practicing it. It's almost like reverse glamour, to show you a memory instead of a reality," Sirius explained and he pulled his sleeves up, holding both wrists out and he concentrated before...his wrists became a bloodied mess. A few were on his arms themselves, but those looked more like angry slashes than planned out. A few were dragged just along the vein, but never to puncture it. Sign of true intent to kill himself but not actually going that far.

Rachel’s eyes widened and her breath stopped as she saw the mess on his arms. She wouldn’t doubt it if he picked up the knife during their break. She reached out, almost fearing that it was real and she was going to hurt him. She traced a gash here and there and when she pulled her hand away, she was almost shocked to see that there wasn’t any blood on her finger tips. It really was a memory, but…she didn’t know what to say.

"I only do this at home. I have an envelope opener I sharpened so no one expects it. I also have a bottle of dittany to cover it up after I felt like I've had enough," Sirius explained. He let out a deep breath and let the glamour go, "I love you. This is a big part of my past."

She leaned against him, hoping her weight was enough to give him a sense that she was there. She wasn’t sure how to talk about this. It wasn’t…pretty what he was doing. It was dangerous, so close to the edge. The things that were happening at home…she probably was never going to understand how severe it was, but the memory gave it away. She touched his arms again, “…Depression? Abuse? All of the above?”

"All of the above...but it is more mental abuse instead of physical," Sirius sighed, nuzzling her hair, "Always treating me like I'm an abomination, and a disgrace to the family. Something went wrong with me. I'm not right in the head. Why can't I be more like my little brother? Obedient and a Slytherin who has /proper/ friends and not mudbloods and halfbreeds, and don't mention James Potter, heavens no."

"Raiden once told me that I'd fling my heart to any poor unsuspecting soul in order to gain some sort of recognition." Rae said after a moment of thought. "Maybe that's what's wrong with us. We long for love, but not...this kind of love. You want the love I have with Mary and Timothy. A love of a family, unconditional. I want the love you have with your friends. The never-ending adventures, the inside jokes." She paused. "I think people see that, and when we long for something, fate makes it harder...sometimes impossible...to get. We drew bad straws from fate's cup." She pulled his arms close to her her, holding them at her stomach and squeezing his arms in a way to say she was hugging him. "Not many people like it when we see things outside the box we're supposed to be confined in. No one likes questions, especially when they're "why" or "why not". It goes against uniform....reason. There's always one person whose the black sheep in the family, no pun intended. It just so happened that's what we are...and black sheep don't usually get sheared for wool. So, what use are we? Depressing way to look at it, sorry."

"No...no it makes a lot of sense," Sirius pressed his lips into a thin line as he thought, glad she couldn't see his face. He rubbed the area of her body his hands layed in a soothing manner, "So...let's continue what we're good at, Rose. Fighting the norm and going against the grain. We can make this work, I know we can. We can want love for each other, can't we? You are our friend, part of our group. Your love for friendship is easy to achieve, you just have to stop thinking you're alone and looking on the outside. Don't you remember my dream journal? Try imagining you're sitting with us, laughing and at ease instead of watching from afar and wanting. My love for family might come at a later time, when I am older, and I am more than willing to wait for it to happen." His nose tickled the hair by her ear, "I'm more than willing to wait especially if I can make that unconditional family love with you."

"I think I'd run away with you first before I marry you." Rae said with a small smile. "Find out where you live, steal you away....take Regulus with us because I'd want him to see what life's like away from toxic people." She sighed after a moment. "Your dreams were always filled with hope. Hope and love and desperation. I think that I should try believing in that more. I may not be able to do it all at once, but Rome wasn't built in a day. I can sit with you more at the table, accept more invites rather than decline. Maybe that should be my new year's motto. Be Brave."

"Be Brave...I like that," Sirius kissed her cheek and then turned her head a bit in over to cover her lips with his own. The angle was a bit awkward, but he had only intended for a quick smack than anything deep, "We still have that one dream that needs to become reality. We can get there," he nodded, "So...you still need to tell me your story. Are you still okay with that?"

"I swore to you I'd tell you everything," Rae snuggled close against his chest. Her heart fluttering in her chest like a hummingbird's wings. "...Where do you want me to begin? Anywhere specific?"

"Back...before the abuse," Sirius requested, "Lead me through your life...I want to know more about your mother. You were so /hopeful/ about your father, so there...had to be something that blackened his heart like that."

Rae sighed softly as she thought about the story. Bria didn’t even know the story. She came around just a little after her mother died and was there when the abuse began. Of course, Rae used Bria’s home as a shelter often, but other times she’d just get so tired of running that it was always “maybe this time”. His question was innocent, but it was heartbreaking. “My mother was a good person.” She said after a moment. “She was wise, and she did her best to raise me. She never raised a hand, and her hugs were always so warm. She was sympathetic when I needed it, loving all the time. My dad…he was fun. On the surface, he was a good person. A type of man that would go on nature walks, teach me how to ride a bike, how to roller-skate. A type of person that would drive on a four-wheeler and let me ride with him. I loved feeling the wind in my face, flying through my hair. I loved sitting with him, and his hugs. We were…a warm, loving family.”

Sirius knew what she liked, so he moved one hand from around her middle and began stroking and running his fingers through her hair, and rubbed her stomach a bit. She enjoyed touch just as much as he did, and he exploited that while she talked, "Do you look more like your mother? Is that why you try to change what you look like a lot, like your hair?"

“I look a lot like her, yes.” Rae nodded. “But no. I change because I…really hate myself.” She paused. “It’s not how I look or anything. I just…hate myself, so I try to change myself so I can like myself a little more. Maybe I like myself more as a girl, maybe I’ll like myself if I dress like a guy. Sometimes…it doesn’t matter. I feel an itch in my blood, under my skin, and I grapple with myself. I’m always hit and punched out of hate, so…if I feel that type of emotion or even anger, I take it out on myself.” She sighed softly. “I used to just dislike myself. Mom understood. Being a witch and living in a muggle work isolated from other witches and wizards was damaging. She was sorry that she couldn’t let me live in a magical community, a place where I was going to be more understood….but dad kept us from that.” She traced his bones on his hand, leading up to his fingers and back again in a soft carcass. “When I was ten…everything fell apart.”

The year before school? Shit...so she had to live in the torment, and arrived to school damaged and broken. He wondered if Hogwarts felt more like a prison rather than an escape, if her father kept her from living in the magical world. He probably hated her even more when she got the letter. He wanted to ask, but he wanted her to continue first, "Tell me her name?" he decided to ask instead.

“Her name was Naomi. It’s Hebrew for pleasant.” Rae explained with a laugh. “Mom liked the name Rachel, as it means little lamb. She wanted me to be gentle. At least, that’s how I always took it to be.” She smiled warmly. “She was a Slythern, as funny as that sounds. I like I mentioned that before.”

"It's fine," Sirius chuckled, "Naomi...such a pretty name. I wonder what made her a Slytherin? An aspiration to get what she wanted?" he contemplated it to himself. By what she sounded like, she sounded more like a Hufflepuff. "I bet she and Marcus would've gotten along famously."

“She was ambitious.” Rae laughed. “Her and Marcus would’ve been firecrackers. Mom knew how to get people to do what she needed them to do. She worked at the Ministry of Magic for a time as a wizarding representative of the law. She knew how to shoot people down, make them think twice about what they were doing or saying, and get plea bargains. She was the lawyer everyone wanted. When she had me, she quit. It would be too suspicious if dad found out that she was a witch. He found out anyway…but he didn’t seem to care.”

"Why didn't she go back? Why wouldn't your dad let you live in a wizarding community?" That was just confusing. If he didn't care then why keep them from their true environment?

“First part of it is that mom had me unexpectedly.” Rae said with a bit of a smile. “She always said that there has to be at least one parent in the house, just in case I needed something from school or to be around in. I couldn’t just grow up in an empty house and think that was right. As for dad…” She pursed her lips together. “I think he pretended he didn’t care. I think he was scared of mom, or maybe he was scared of me? Of what could happen if we did go into an environment that was magical. I honestly don’t understand it myself. Maybe I never will.”

He twirled a strand of hair around his finger and kissed it, "Alright...so...tell me what happened to Naomi?"

“Well, it happened really fast.” Rae took a breath. “She went into the muggle doctor’s place to ask for medicine since her chest was feeling tight and she wasn’t able to breathe. She had asthma and was prone to getting pneumonia in the lungs. It’s dangerous, but…she always knew how to handle it. Well, the old muggle doctor who used to prescribe her medicine had passed away a year ago, so this was a new doctor. He prescribed her some medicine…and the moment she took it…that night…she threw a stapler at my wall in order to get me to come out and I saw her hunched over on the couch, purple and bloated in the face. She clearly couldn’t breathe. Dad wasn’t home, he was on his way out of country for a meeting. So I had to call the ambulance and get her to the hospital. I stayed by her side, crying. She was okay….they managed to keep her for a few days and she was breathing just fine. Told her take the medicine again…and call if something were to happen again…”

She lowered her eyes. “We didn’t think, none of us thought that it was the medicine. She took it again a week later, after being cautious and this time instead of not breathing…she was in severe pain. She screamed, she walked and paced, sat down, stood up, she had to keep moving in order to keep the pain away. I was so scared. They sent me to a babysitter’s place, but I couldn’t sleep. I kept by the phone waiting…and waiting…

This time the pain did not recede and they had to bring her to another hospital that was more than capable of trying to heal.”

"How did no one notice it was the medicine?" That made Sirius upset, "That's a severe reaction! What the actual..." he growled low, but he took a deep breath. It wouldn't help if he got upset, "Did she end up on...bugger, what was it called...life support? What happened?"

“Mom didn’t know that she was allergic to sulfa medications, and the doctors were firm that it couldn’t be the medicine. Mostly for profit.” Rae felt her throat tighten and her eyes fill with tears. This was…getting harder to talk about. It was hitting too close to the nightmares that she dreamed of. Of a white sheet and papers strewn over the floor. A body lying underneath and disembodied voices talking in a low murmur, practically white noise over the loud shriek of the heart monitor. “She was in so much pain. They drugged her up with morphine even though they knew, mom knew, that it wouldn’t have much affect. But it was a way to keep the pain away. Mom had bad blood pressure, but it was either have blood pressure medicine and deal with the pain, or….not to have it and have the pain recede. Her blood pressure skyrocketed….”

She bowed her head. “If she was on life support, I wasn’t aware of it. I…tried not to go into the hospital room. Seeing her like that scared me. I prayed. I used to be Christian so I found a chapel in the hospital. I prayed, I bargained. I swore to give up my magic, to break away from the magical community. I could become a muggle. I could do whatever God needed me to do, just please don’t take her…and she died. So…I left that religion and all of it’s beliefs. I took my magic, discovered muggles had their own version of it, and nursed it. My father…his mask broke. Clearly I had magic, clearly I could bring her back. When I couldn’t…he didn’t talk to me. The house was cold, but I was alright. I learned how to take care of myself. When the beatings started, I ran into a neighbor’s backyard, bloodied and that’s how I met Bria. She didn’t ask questions, just told me I needed a shower and made sure not to touch me. I was a little…out of it.”

All of that...Sirius had a swirl of emotions and he wasn't sure what to focus on. Anger at her father, anger at the muggle doctors...sadness for Rachel, but also for her father. That had obviously been devastating for him, but he couldn't forgive him for the way he handled his grief. He tried not to let any of it get to him, however, just stayed as calm as possible and held her tighter, "Kit's really 'go with the flow' isn't she? That doesn't surprise me she was so chill at finding you like that." He shook his head, a weak laugh leaving him, "The rest is history, isn't it? Or is there more you wish to tell me that doesn't fit anywhere else?"

“I didn’t talk for three years, or was it two?” Rae smiled softly. “I learned sign language from a person I met at a library who could interpret for the deaf. But yeah, the rest is history. I kept hope that maybe I was wrong and my father really was a good man. When he told me he was getting clean, getting help, I really thought that this was it. I was getting….tired. It tied up a lot of loose ends…going there. But I managed to hurt myself in the process. I broke my arm, I was choked. I’m…pretty sure he tired to do something sexual with me. Maybe he did and I blacked out, maybe he didn’t, I really am not sure. What I know is that I was dragged my stuff down a dark street and asked Nana to pick me up, Bria’s grandma. But…yeah the rest is history.”

"Were you...were you sore...there?" Sirius felt a twist in his stomach. Please no, that's just...that would be too much. He would've had to go find one of his friends so /not/ to go beat her father to a pulp with his bare fists, no magic.

"No," Rae shook her head. "I mostly felt pain in my legs and in my stomach. My head was also throbbing."

"That's good...that's good," Sirius released a breath he didn't realize he'd been holding and nuzzled her neck, squeezing her tightly, "I'm glad you are feeling better since then, as well. I am sorry for my part, but I was just going off of what others had told me, which was that he was bad news. Hearing all about this, I understand why you felt the way you did. It makes a lot more sense, and I really am sorry."

"I'm sorry too." Rae turned over, draping herself against his chest, arms up and winding around his neck as she kissed his cheek and leaned her head against his, breathing in his scent and how comforting it was. She liked how he ran his hands down her back, her skin forming goosebumps from his linger touch. "I'm sorry that I hurt you, but...I'm glad this is over now. We can move on."

"Yes, yes we can," Sirius was happy about that, "We can focus on us now, instead of our pasts. You have a new family that loves you, and my friends are more than willing to take you in. James may take a little convincing, but Peter, Remus, and Raiden all still like you." He grinned and kissed her firmly, lovingly, "I want to prove everyone wrong. Our love doesn't have to be a tragic one."

Rae nodded her agreement, letting him go and smiling. It was like a weight was lifted off of her chest, off of her entire body. She felt like Sirius felt the same. The burdens were shared...and it was finally over. "I think our love story's better without the melancholy too." She gave him a gentle kiss. "I love you."

()

It had been a wonderful trip. Bria and Rae had split off from them, so it had just been the four Marauders. Sirius was bounding forward, a bounce in his step since they had found successfully a surprise idea that he wanted to do for Valentine’s day. “It doesn’t take much to cheer him up anymore.” Remus said thoughtfully as Sirius got Peter into a headlock and started to give him a noogie. “Maybe our fears were unfounded.”

“Still a bloody disaster.” James commented dryly as Peter shoved Sirius off, his face red and his breathing heavy. On spur of the moment, as if they had the same idea, both Sirius and Peter stooped down.

“Oh no.” Remus grinned, highly amused. It had been a while.

“Oh bloody yes!” James grinned as Sirius got up faster than Peter and tossed the first snowball. It hit Peter’s side of the arm. Peter let out a cry, but tossed his own. It hit true on Sirius’ body and James bent down grinning as he hurriedly made his own. Remus was about to get down to make his own, prepared that he was going to get into it sooner than later when a snowball from Sirius’ smacked him in the face.
“I thought I was on your side!” Remus spluttered as he wiped the snow off of his face.

“You were taking too fucking long.” Sirius grinned. “You’re on Peter’s now mate.”

“Better him than James,” Peter said, as he gathered more snow. It smacked James and James let out a cry, running towards Sirius’s side and doing his best to toss it at Peter at the same time. Peter, who was much shorter, didn’t have to bend over to watch the snow ball go over his head. Remus used that distraction to his advantage to make his own. “Wow who were you hitting?” Peter asked dryly.

“No one in particular it seems like,” Remus grinned as he tossed his and it hit James’ face, his glasses threatened to fall off his nose.

“Oi!” James shouted as he ran for safety as Peter threatened to toss another. Sirius tossed his own towards Remus and Remus dodged only to hear a female squawk. He turned around to see who it was just in time for a random snow ball to hit him in the back of the head.

"What did I get myself into?!" Bria screamed as she brushed the snow from her face and her eyes went wide before she ducked behind the stone wall that lined the path to and from Hogsmeade as Sirius threw a snowball at her, "No! Stop, I'm innocent!" she cried in the middle of a fit of giggles.

"No one's innocent in a snowball fight! Remus you cheater!" James cried out dramatically as Remus spun around, hopelessly with his mouth hanging from cut-off apologies and a "fuck you" to whoever hit him in the head. "You called in reinforcements!"

"NO ONE'S INNOCENT HERE!" Sirius shouted, a awry snowball hitting him in the back of the knee and making him kneel, but that gave him cause to grab another handful and he chucked it, watching it ark and plop on top of James' head like a snow turd. He busted up and fell back laughing.

"The way you two jinxed each other with that statement, that was great," Bria laughed from her hiding spot, but she soon popped up with a well-packed snowball and threw it randomly, and it hit Peter's stomach.

"What the blazing fuck! I'm on your side!" James stomped over towards where Sirius was lying down and started shaking his head over Sirius' face. "Dandruff snow alert!" He let out a yelp as Sirius' hand wrapped around his ankle and sent him falling down.

"It looks like there are no sides, James!" Bria shouted.

"Screw all of you with a pitchfork!" James snapped as he wrestled with Sirius and let out a sharp yip when he felt him shove snow down his shirt. "COLD AS FUCK! GODDAMN IT SIRIUS!"

Peter didn't bother trying to hit the wrestling duo with a snowball. Instead, he grinned mischievously as he sent one of his at Remus who was still standing there a little flabbergasted at how fast everyone changed course. "Looks like there's only three now." He grinned. "And one of us is a bit on the day-dreamy side. Getting ~distracted~?"

"You could impress Lily with that wiggle-worm dance, James!" Bria called behind them, not hearing Peter's comment over the shouting of the two boys.

"Should I give him more snow?!" Sirius called and Bria cheered a yes, which made the Black grin evilly and he grabbed the back of James' collar as he tried to get away, shoving a huge handful down the back of his coat and delighting in the scream.

Remus shook his head from whatever thoughts and whatever words that were trying to process. Instead, he bent down and gathered some more snow. His clothes were starting to become soaked and his poor heating charms were only helping so much. Since Bria was distracted, why not? He tossed the snowball at her back. "Did you forget there's a battle going on sweetheart?" He asked, his green eyes glinting. "Or are we not fun enough for you?"

"You hang out with Sirius too much, that was a Sirius line." Peter sighed rolling his eyes at them.
Bria shrieked and jumped up, but her own green orbs glinted with a fire, "Oh, I'll get you! I didn't forget!" she packed two snowballs in rapid succession and threw both since she knew he'd be able to dodge one at least, then she dove for a new hiding spot, "Catch me if you can!" she called. She was slow at making snowballs, probably the slowest of the group, but they were good, solid ones that flew through the air and made a great impact, even if her aim was off. To make up for it she was great at dodging, twisting and winding and going behind poles or new spots behind the wall.

Sirius had finally let James go in order to start up the fight on his end again, tossing a big snowball at Peter with both hands, and it caked his friend's hair, "Ha! Take that!"

It continued like this for a while. Each and everyone of them doing their hardest to get one another soaked. After a while, James and Sirius were finally at an end. James had not only managed to put more amounts of snow in Sirius’ clothes, but his final move had included smothering Sirius face with the frozen stuff. Remus and Bria had done their hardest to keep going, but Remus managed to make Bria cry Uncle after a snow ball managed to hit her face again and she couldn’t feel her cheeks.

“I think I’m the winner.” Peter said, surveying the casualties of the war. “Considering I’m the last one standing and all.”

“I’m too tired to even try to knock you off your throne too.” James stood up, brushing his cloak of snow. His finger tips freezing now that the heat charm wore off. “Hot chocolate and a fireplace at the common room?” He asked.

“Good idea.” Peter agreed as Remus walked over to Bria and ruffled her hair before pulling her into a hug.

“Good game.” Remus husked into her ear, his warm breath thawing out the cold rim of it just for a tiny second.

"That tone of voice is unfair, we still have to get back to the castle," Bria whined back in a whisper, shuddering a bit at the spike of heat, but she held him back just as tightly. "Even wit my clothes wet, I feel like I should take my jacket off. I'm sweating!" she laughed, this time her voice louder as she pulled away.

"Haha! I say the same!" Sirius grinned, but he actually did so, "Rose missed a great opportunity to torture us. I feel like she would've tied with you in victory, Peter."

Peter smiled. "I wouldn't doubt it. She's smart enough not to be around us when there's snow involved." He stretched. "I want out of these damn wet clothes, so let's start walking."

"LAST ONE TO THE COMMON ROOM WON'T GET THE FIRE!" James shouted as he took off running, shoving Sirius to the side.

~*~

Of course, the threat was invalid as Peter was the last one, not liking to run, but he used his 'I won the fight' to his advantage to void it. James had just snorted, chuckled, and let it go. Once Bria was changed, all warm in some fuzzy pajamas since they didn't plan on going anywhere else for the day, she discovered her boyfriend on the big squishy chair and plopped down on his' lap with a book in her hand. She twisted her body so her back was on one arm rest and her legs dangling over the other, and snuggled down.

"I hope you weren't planning on getting up anytime soon," Sirius drawled, amused.

"What are you reading?" Remus asked, rolling his eyes at Sirius' comment and not bothering to answer it. "Besides if I need anything, Sirius, I could always ask you to get it for me."

"He's not wrong." James answered from his star-fish position on the floor, eyes closed and his glasses off on the coffee table. He looked like a happy-camper just sitting on the warm floor, not even caring about what was happening around him and just soaking up the good vibes.

"No, he's not, but I still bite my thumb at you anyway," Sirius did so and flicked the digit as well.

"Shakespeare reference!" Bria called, "Good one. Hmm...and I'm not too sure you /want/ to know what I'm reading. Something I brought from home," she smirked up at him, eyes peeking slyly from her lashes.

"I could tickle it out of you," Remus shrugged. "Or I could-" He wrapped one arm around her waist and his other hand tried to grab for the book as Bria quickly started playing "keep away". "It can't be that bad." He laughed as he failed again to catch it.

"Should I help?" Sirius asked with a smirk at Remus, posing to get up.

"Noooo! You can't!" Bria giggled, twisting her arm again to avoid another swipe.

"Sirius don't listen to your girlfriend's friend." Remus laughed as he tried again. "This may take a two teamed effort."

"You sure?" James asked lazily. "Because from where I'm sitting it sounds like you have an advantage."

"Shut up, James!" Bria squeaked as Remus /almost/ got it, but she knew he was just playing. He had much longer arms and musician fingers. If he /really/ wanted it he could have it, especially if he held her just a bit... "Oh!"

James snatched the book away from his face as it nearly hit his nose and grinned as Remus nearly made them fall over on the floor due to how rough they were starting to get with each other. "Easy." He drawled as he cracked open the book. At first, he wasn't registering what he was reading, and then a wicked smile started to appear on his face. He wolf-whistled before reading, ""His yellow eyes glinted in the moonlight, his fanged teeth were getting longer. His nails scratched at Damien's skin as he pulled his lover close to the edge of the bed, legs dangling helplessly on either side of his torso. Damien looked up, eyes half-lidded and giving a full-body shudder at the predatory look Alex was giving him." He cleared his throat and continued. "'I'm not about to stop. No matter how much you beg, I won't stop. Do you understand me?' Damien moaned, 'Yes sir,'" -James pitched his voice to do that exactly, causing Remus' ears to flare red.- "'I don't want you to stop. You're torturing me.'" James snorted, but did his best to continue. "'Only for you my dear,' Alex purred'....wait werewolves purr?"

Bria covered her face, her face as red as their Gryffindor banner, and a soft 'oh no' was barely heard through her hands.

Sirius choked on his tea, his face also red but not nearly as bad as the two on the chair, "Well...I was expecting some lady wolf, because, you know...but two men?"

"It's rare to find a LBGT book." Remus commented as James set the book away from his face, his arm getting too tired to keep holding it up. "Let a lone a book of werewolves."

"Muggles have the strangest ideas on how sex works." James said as he picked the book back up. "They didn't use lube. They didn't. Use. Lube. It was spit guys. SPIT. Werewolves, from what I understand, do not lubricate from their mouths."

"How would you even know what a werewolves can and can't do in the bedroom, James?" Remus asked, highly amused.

"I hear you and Sirius fuck."

Remus' cheeks heated a bright, bright red. Well shit this got awkward. It was obvious how James heard him and Sirius, that was an incident /never/ to be forgotten. But...Bria on the other hand...Remus couldn't remember if he mentioned this to her...or not.

"Oh!" Bria finally peeked up from behind her hands, "I knew it!"

Sirius paused, "You what?"

"Well...I guess that's why...I brought it...it kinda...reminded me of you two," Bria cleared her throat, but her blushing hadn't died.

"Are we /that/ obvious?" Sirius eyeballed Remus.

"It appears so." Remus said after a moment. "I wasn't really trying too hard to hide it. Considering that most of the people around us are oblivious and it doesn't take much."

"Gryffindors are honeybadgers. We don't give a fuck." James handed the book back to Bria. "I'm going to need brain-bleach or something for that book though. God. You should read something that has proper sex etiquette. Rae might know of a werewolf sex book."

"We are not dragging Rae into your shenanigans about my sex life, or other werewolf sex lives." Remus nudged James with his toe. "You'd just forget about this in the morning anyway. You're dead on the ground."

"If I give him a blanket he might just pass out, not that he'd need one being right next to the fireplace," Sirius hummed, drinking his tea again, "Well, at least the cat's out of the bag. No, James, by the way, werewolves don't purr. They can growl nice and low, but it's still a growl, nothing like a cat."

"I...kept thinking it was like he rolled his 'r' in 'my dear' kind of like you do in Spanish, that can sound like a purr," Bria explained, demonstrating as she talked.

Sirius noticed how Remus twitched at her vocal show-off, but he just smiled innocently, "Wow, I guess that's one way to think about it. Do you know Spanish?"

"Ah...not really, but Rae does," Bria shrugged, "I enjoy talking to other's cats here with it, though, so I am pretty good at making the purr sound. Sometimes I wish I'd gotten a cat instead but an owl was more convenient if I needed things from home since I'm forgetful."

"Sounds reasonable." Remus nodded. He had to shift a little. He knew that he was starting to pop an awkward boner, but hopefully his sweatpants would keep that hidden. He was so thankful he didn't wear boxers like Sirius when he wore loose pants.

"You really /are/ a Kitty, aren't you?" If Sirius hadn't used up all his 'evil' mojo during the snowball fight, he'd ask Bria to show off a little more by saying Remus' name with that purring effect, but ah, it was enjoyable just seeing the tension in his friend's posture. Instead, he finished his tea and set it to the side, standing and going over to James, shaking him with his bare foot, "Hey, wake up enough so I can drag you to bed," he called.

"You'll have to drag me Sirius." James said, holding his hands up so Sirius could take them. "I'm not getting up until we reach the stairs."

"You lazy pile," Sirius chuckled and heaved James up, then hoisted him over his shoulder in a fireman's carry, "Merlin...good thing I keep up with you as you're bulking up at the Quidditch ring during practice, or you'd be too heavy," he muttered then winked at Remus before he hauled his cousin to the tower stairs that lead to their dorm.

"I told you, you didn't want to know," Bria mumbled from behind the cover of her book, "James just /had/ to read it out loud. I didn't meant to make anything...sexual. I don't...I don't want you to think everything has to lead back to naughty things. I was enjoying the relaxed atmosphere." She bit her lip to stop before she rambled off.

"It's fine, it's fine." Remus laughed softly, tucking a stray strand of hair away from Bria's face and hugged her. "It was all in good laughs. I hope that we didn't make you uncomfortable, that James didn't. When he's tired, he acts like more of a goofball."

"No...no, he didn't. I would've blushed no matter who got the book," Bria smiled and set her book away, wrapping her arms around him and nuzzling his neck. She felt her cheeks heat up again, "Did...you like it? When I purred?" she whispered shyly. "I hope I didn't make /you/ uncomfortable."

"I did." Remus smiled. "You really were just like a cat. It didn't make me uncomfortable." He shook his head and pressed a kiss to her cheeks. "It's something that I'll keep in mind for when we get a chance to ourselves."

That made her happy, and his kiss made her grin. Relaxing against him, she just kept her head on his shoulder and watched the fire, "Your birthday is in two months, yeah? Do you have anything you want to do?" she decided to ask.

"Hm. That's a good question." Remus said thoughtfully. "I haven't given it much thought. I'm sure James will be planning a party, even if I tell him not to. I think that I'd mostly would want to spend time with you. Though doing what, I'll have to think about."

"No, you don't have to think of anything. It's your birthday, I'll try and come up with something instead," Bria said firmly, "We have plenty of time. I was just curious," she kissed the under-side of his jaw, "I love you, /Remus/," she did the thing where she vibrated her throat and tongue, purring his name now they were alone and they wouldn't get embarrassed, "I'll make sure your birthday is amazing."

Remus grinned and hugged her again, this time he allowed himself to have a growl in his chest as he said, "I love you too, Bria." What an animalistic pair they made.

~*~

It had been a few weeks later. Everyone was becoming busy with their classes and schoolwork. Rae and Sirius rarely had time to see each other besides Lunch and Divination. When they did eat lunch, Rae would sit by them. At first, he refused to start a conversation with her, ignoring the looks of contempt and exasperation from Remus and Peter. Bria knew better than to push, in fact it was quite easy to see that not even she really forgave Rae for what happened. Not really.

However, dragging it out wasn’t James’ style. He preferred to nip things, if able. Therefore, when he came across her during their weekend, he took that advantage and stopped her before she turned the corner to go towards the library, or the Ravenclaw tower.

“We need to talk.” Rae was startled, but before she could open her mouth, James pressed forward. “But first, do you have another set of cards that aren’t Oracle? I’m not looking for emotional guidance here.”

She pursed her lips together. It was in her very right to say no, but James knew that she was thinking that she owed him. She nodded her head, “I don’t have them with me.”

“Meet me in the abandon classroom, and bring them.” He told her before leaving her alone. He knew that he confused her, but…he needed to know.

He couldn’t make this mistake twice.

~+~

She beat him there with a green deck of cards that were smaller than her oracle and thinner. She was starting at them, her hair falling into her eyes as she mouthed something. A prayer, undoubtedly to cleanse the tarot cards in an attempt to read. Her eyes wandered up as James took a seat across from her.

The tension was like a heavy invisible cloak that surrounded them. It didn’t keep them warm, nor cold. It kept their nerves and their hearts on high alert and beating fast like a bumblebee. Every sound in the classroom was heightened. He could hear the soft creaks of the floorboard, a chair scraping across the floor or just pressed slightly down on the wood. He could hear the wind and where the drafts were coming from. The air didn’t feel clean and fresh, but stale and dusty.

Silently, she pushed the deck towards James and without prompting, he began to shuffle. He handed the cards back to her and she laid them out in a 10 card spread. The first six were in a type of cross, with one card lying on top of another in the middle. The other four were in a straight line.

“Bria gave me this deck for Christmas.” Rae explained after a moment, making James glance up at her in surprise. “She knew I liked the Legend of Camelot.”

“Are you a Knight or are you Lady Morrigan?” James questioned.

“That’s the question isn’t it? Whose a villain and whose not?” Rae pursed her lips together. “It shouldn’t be a surprise to me, but,” she tapped the first card. it was an open field and an open blue sky. A man was lying down against a tree and a bird flew over head. “But it seems to me that peace has been disrupted. This is a chance to clear up what had went wrong in the past, as the Sleeping Lords are protectors. They have their duties to the land.”

She tapped on the card that laid across it. A tombstone with two spears against it. The words Spear Five was ominous to James. “The two brothers who fought in the legends was a devastating war.” She explained after a moment. “This tells me that there are matters that are complicating the ability to move forward and to fix the wrongs.”

James knew that he shouldn’t be impressed. Not with anything that she was saying, but at the same time it was hard not to. Here, he wasn’t dealing with someone who pretended to know the cards and pretended to know what was right and wrong. Everything was being dealt, everything was on the table for both of them to look at. Rae was no pretender.

In fact, he knew very well that a real fortune-teller told fortunes at their own risk. Rae, who had no point in giving that risk to him…was. But that didn’t mean forgiveness.

She pointed to a card that was upside down, the words Sword Five was interesting. This was the second time James had a five in his deck. Inside was a house burning in the middle of the day. Everything around it was barren and crude. “You’re cautious against treachery and treason.” She said after a moment. “You aren’t the one to be bitten twice.”

Instead of questioning, James watched her tap the card clockwise to it. “Guinevere. The Queen of Camelot and Arther’s loving wife. Who once upon the time loved only one man, loved two. Just like she indulged in herself and her own selfishness, so had you. So had everyone. This is what brought us discord, and this is why trust has become an issue.”

She continued up, “But the Spear Knight, though upside down, tells me that you’re willing to take a risk. You’re risking something in order to gain understanding from a misunderstanding that happened.”

“That’s right.” James said firmly.

“Do you want me to continue or have you heard enough?” Rae questioned, glancing up at him.

“I think I should hear more. We both do.” If this was her way of communication, and this was his way of showing his vulnerability, then there wasn’t a need not to continue.

“This one,” she pointed at the bottom of the line. It was a river, and floating on top of it was a sword that was stuck in the stone. At first, James thought it’d be the story of Excalibur, but instead Rae had a different story told. “Galahad was the only knight who was able to pull a sword from a floating stone up. This tells me that you’re making progress, and you know that you don’t want your reputation or your friendships to be known for their fights.”

“I don’t,” James agreed softly.

“And because of that, people will see you as someone who is daring and will go through lengths for his friends. You won’t let anything happen to them and you’ll make sure that your friendships will stay strong through the thick and the thin. You don’t like having people in your debt though.” Rachel smiled softly. “Therefore, you have to let go of your emotional immaturity. The quest for you to find reconciliation will require a hard mind, a good heart, and a forgiving spirit. Otherwise, you’ll remain stagnant.” She pointed to the last card. “Therefore you must question yourself on what you truly want in your heart.”

James watched her for a moment as she started to pick up the cards. “I don’t forgive you.”

“No. I told Sirius that you wouldn’t, but he said that time will tell.” Rae agreed as she shuffled the cards and set them aside. “So if you don’t want forgiveness, what’s with the song and dance?”

“I wanted you to see what my conflict was.” James admitted, putting his hands on the table and folding them. “I wanted you to see with your own eyes about what’s going on in my mind. My quest is a quest of trust, if we’re going to put it in layman’s terms. Do I trust you or do I let you go. To be honest, I wouldn’t be talking to you right now if it wasn’t for Peter.”

“Peter?” Rae blinked in surprise. She thought Sirius might’ve asked or begged or something.

“Sirius is smitten with you.” James told her softly. “He loved you, loves you, with more than his soul and heart combined. He wants to be your everything. While I love him myself, I can’t trust that kind of judgement. I told him you were dangerous and that he should break up with you. At first it was a maybe, and then it was a “let’s see how she’d take it if she finds out I’m still with her” and then it was a “never”. Peter on the other hand, doesn’t have that issue.”

“Why do you trust Peter over Remus?”

“Remus is biased considering that he’s dating your best friend. If I had to go to someone, it might’ve been Raiden, or even Eri, but Peter was the one that made me talk to you first. At least, before we talk to Raiden or Eri.”

“I see, so we’re going to jump through hoops. We’re going to talk, and then we’re going to be discussing this in front of someone else…why?”

“To see what I should do. What is the right move.” James paused. “What you did to us, did to him…was awful. But you don’t need me to hound on something that should be done and over with, so I’ll just be blunt. I think you’re toxic.”

“And Peter?”

“He believes that I’m not looking at it from the right angle. Funnily enough, Remus once mentioned to me that if Bria is the one who flows with time, you are the one that stops the flow. You’re not apart of it. Peter said that you see things others can’t. Therefore, you’ll react to things strongly. I’m telling you right now though that we are not book characters. We’re not dancing to a story of your creation.” James pursed his lips together. “Peter may only like you because you see him for who he is. You see everyone for who they are. That’s why we’re so easy to destroy isn’t it? You have Sirius dancing on puppet strings and Bria too. You’ll abuse them and leave them and use them. Maybe not physically, but emotionally and I won’t let you do that.”

Rae said nothing.

“Now you know my issue.” James gestured at the cards. “Now you know what my debate is. Do I throw my lot in with Sirius, or do I keep my ground. If I keep my ground, is that my emotional immaturity showing or is that my greatest strength? Do I forgive you and let it go, or do I hold this grudge because I know damn well that you’re going to hurt again?”

“You won’t take my word.” Rae noted.

"I won't," James agreed.

“A long song and dance just to tell me that we’re going to go to counseling.” Rae rolled her eyes as she stood up and took her cards. “Let’s go. Should you also take out your wand and put it to my back?”

“If I thought you were dangerous, Lockheart. I’d do it in a heartbeat.” James nodded as he too stood up and together walked out to go to the kitchen to find Eri.

~+~

"Raiden, do you have a hole in your lip? It's all over your chin!" Eri's giggle greeted them as they turned the corner into the kitchen. Eri was kissing away the soup on her lover's chin when she spotted them and she blinked in surprise, "Oh! Company!" she started to smile, before it faded again, "Uh-oh...something's up, isn't it?"

"We need to have a discussion and I can't promise myself to be in the right mind having it without a couple of watchers." James agreed. "Though I do want a bowl of that soup if you're willing to share."

"Of course! Raiden was just taste-testing it for me...or, well, /trying/ to," she poked his side and grinned at his bashful look before busying herself with getting bowls and eating utensils.

"I missed," Raiden watched as Rae and James slid into the table, right across from one another. "So, what is this about? The Christmas fiasco still?"

"A little bit." James admitted. "More of the lines that Sirius is getting way to deep and I'm not sure if I should pull the plug on this entire thing or if I should let go and let it be." He looked at Rae squarely. "Thought that if we chatted a bit, we'd get somewhere. But I already told her that I'm not forgiving yet..though that's also a possibility."

"No one is expecting you to forgive her, Pop," Eri told him honestly, "You are, after all, the Leader of the Pack. If any of your family gets hurt in any way, papa bear comes out, and I wonder if you're scarier than a mama bear," she smiled and set the bowls in front of them before going back to the stove to move things around so it wouldn't keep cooking and she could let things cool off.

"Sirius is." James said after a moment of thought. He kept his eyes on Rae for a moment before looking away. "He has a whole plan that he wants to do. Every time I tell him to slow down, to think, he tells me that the only reason why I'm saying it is because I haven't forgiven you." He watched her. "Which is another reason why I listened to Peter. He's both of our friend and he doesn't like being put into the middle."

"It's not just Sirius, though, Pop," Eri coaxed, "Bria became part of the Marauder family hard and fast, and you took to her like you did to me. She was also hurt. Two of your precious people were hurt, not just one. It reverberated through Remus. With Bria sad, Remus was sad, and in the end, your whole Pack was impacted. That's why this is hard for you." She had a bowl for herself now and handed Raiden his, "Now, don't spill any this time."

They got to the table and Eri actually continued, "If it was /just/ Sirius, this would be easier. Bria and Remus are just as smitten with each other as Sirius and Rae are, but you're not telling /them/ to slow down. Sirius is a determined person, you know that. He hates doing things half-assed. I tell you, if Remus was a girl and Bria a boy, Bria would also have things planned out and be sweeping Remus off his feet. They're quite similar it's terrifying sometimes. Of course, that's also why they leaned on each other so hard those blasted rumors spread around that they were dating."

"Eri has a point." Rae said after a moment, causing James to look at her. "I'm not apart of your group. What I did affected everyone, because Bria knew the danger that I was getting myself into. It wasn't just the verbal abuse. I scared them. Badly."

Raiden watched the two of them for a moment and decided to throw his own two cents in. "What exactly are you after, James? If you're looking for closure, are you sure you're going to get it here? You said it yourself James, you don't want to forgive. But for Sirius' sake you're trying. Is that really the right way to go?"

"You won't be able to get Sirius away from her," Eri added after another moment of silence, "There is no plug to be pulled. If you keep them apart, he is going to rebel against you. No one wants that. That will cause an even bigger rift. I feel as though you are so set to believe that she will hurt everyone again, you won't believe her otherwise. So...don't. Don't believe her. Instead, watch her. This won't be fixed in a day. Watch it take it's course. School is tough, and keeping everyone busy, but I see that Lock is trying to make amends."

"Hey. You don't trust my word." Rae said after a moment. "And there's no way I can promise I can't hurt nor won't hurt Sirius. It's impossible. We'll argue. We'll fight. We'll make up. He might accidentally knock my head into a cupboard and I could accidentally hit him with a fridge door if I don't see him standing next to me. If you really want to make sure that this relationship works. If you're determined to make sure that we're happy...then give me two years. If I do anything. Anything at all in those two years to make you suspicious or angry at me, I'll end it for you."

"That's a reckless promise," Raiden frowned.

"Two years." James frowned.

"Traditionally, I would go with the rule of three and give you three years instead." Rae paused and looked away. "But I can't promise that. I can only promise the last two years of our school lives, because once we graduate, life will decide what path we have to take. We won't be on the same road. Therefore, we won't be as affected by this type of thing as we are now."

"That makes sense," Eri agreed, "You do realize that is a rule of three, though? By the 'second year' of your two year plan, you and Sirius will have been together for three. Luck is in your favor."

James pursed his lips together. "All I have is your word."

"Give me an inch." Rae smiled sadly. "And I promise I won't give you a mile unless you give it to me first."

"I think it's a good compromise. It'll be an exercise in trust, something you both lost." Raiden nodded.

"You also have witnesses," Eri soothed James.

"Alright. I'll tell Sirius that we came to a compromise." James sighed. "This went a little better than I thought."

"Thanks." Rae smiled.

()

The next week flew by in a hurry, and before anyone knew it it was Valentine's Day. Unfortunately, it landed on a school day, so that meant teachers had fussy children afraid of 'cuties' ready to bolt and the couples were ready to flock to Hogsmeade at three when classes ended. The halls were decked with red, pinks, and whites with all the frilly, girly stuff imaginable. On top of it, cupids were flying around delivering love letters and other treats meant for someone's significant other and they were too shy to give it to them themselves.

Sirius knew this was the best time, if any, to fulfill that dream in is journal, running up to Rachel in the halls and he grinned from ear to ear at her, walking backwards, "Rose! I have the perfect plan for tonight, if you're up for it!" he hoped she noticed what he was playing at, but if not that was fine, "Isn't it good we only have a few more classes left? Though, I do hope Tim and Mary aren't expecting you home," his grin turned wicked.

"I'm staying at the dormitory." Rae smiled as she watched Sirius walk with confidence as he went backwards. It was a little funny that everyone seemed to know to just step around him, rather than bump into him. Then again, they were in the least of the crowded parts of the hallway. "I promised the weekend. Why? You planning on taking me somewhere?"

"Not outside the castle, no," he winked, "It's not any of the usual places, either, though. Remus /thankfully/ gave in and gave me what I need. Bria helped me out a bit, too, since she knows your stuff."

Rae raised an eyebrow. "Um...I'm almost scared on what Bria's advice was."

"Haha, it's nothing terrible I /promise/...though I can't promise /I'm/ not terrible," He gave her a cheeky smirk before he walked beside her the rest of the way to her class, even though his was far from it, and he pulled something from his pack, presenting her a solid, velvet fake rose on a felt stem with a flourish, "Rose, my dear Milady Rose! Won't you be so kind as to accept this and my feelings for you?" he purred as he did a sort of bow, people in the hall pausing to stare.

Rae nearly stumbled in shock, eyes going wide. Mostly because of the sappy line and flourished bow that could only come out of a well-written Shakespear play. She took the rose carefully, as if it was real, and touched the petals. It was soft, not rough like some fake flowers were. "It's gorgeous." She said, smiling as she took the gift and placed it in her bag. "I'll be sure to find a pretty vase to keep it in too, that way I can make the girls jealous. Might not be a real one, but..." she shrugged. "I wouldn't want to be cleaning up the flower petals anyway." She smiled at him. "But of course I accept, and your feelings for me."

Sirius' smile faltered for just a moment, before a new glint sparked his eyes and he gave a hearty laugh. Oh, she had no idea, did she? Oh boy," he shook his head and when they reached the classroom door he kissed her on the cheek, "I look forward to stealing you away for the day. Enjoy your classes, and say hi to Remus for me. I know you have a class with him today," he smirked, winked, and sauntered away, not even worried about being late for his class. Her reaction when she found out would be awesome. Too bad he'd miss it. Remus could tell him all about it, though.

~+~

Rae sat down at the front of the classroom like usual, taking out a book for her to read. It was thick, and she barely started on it last night. It was a muggle one, so she doubted anyone would be too interested. She took out her bookmark and she started to read, just as she felt a presence sit down next to her.

“Reading the war book?” Remus questioned.

“American Muggles have many wars that they claim to.” Rae sighed, her eyes only glancing at him before looking back at the page. “How are you?”

“I’m good.” Remus’ eyes glanced down towards her bag and looked at her hand that was propping her head up. “Didn’t Sirius give you his gift?”

“He did!” Rae beamed as she suddenly grabbed the rose that was peaking out from the zipper and handed it to him. “Isn’t it cute? It’s fake and all, which is a bit sad, but otherwise I think it’s pretty.”

“…” Sirius didn’t ask her? Was she debating about it? “Yes, it’s gorgeous. But I couldn’t help but to notice that you’re not wearing the gift. Was it too fast and you’re thinking things through?”

“Thinking…things through?” Rae echoed, looking puzzled and stumped.

“…You are aware that this is a jewelry box, yes?” Remus asked. “Bria told us that you were a collector of boxes. Therefore we had to pick one up that we thought matched you and that you’d use it. Sirius didn’t want you to just…discard something that can be useful to you.”

“…..” Rae stared at Remus like he was just standing on top of his head, in the middle of class, on the table. She looked at the rose and frowned. “Where’s the hinges and seams then?”

“A bit hard to feel for, but it’s right here.” Remus assured as he carefully opened the box up. Inside was a pure white interior and a rose shaped ring stared ut at her. In the middle of the rose was a diamond, and on either side of it was leaves that guided the band to a circle.

Her mouth dropped. “Um…”

“I have to apologize on his behalf.” Remus rolled his eyes. “I think he thought that if he was subtle enough, without having to go down on one knee in front of God and everyone, that you’d catch the hint.”

“I…”

“He was trying to propose to you.” He continued.

“So that’s why James was telling me that everything was happening too fast.” Rae pushed the box towards her, not closing it. She was clearly dazzled that Sirius had put in a lot of thought into the engagement ring. She touched it, delicately as if she didn’t want her finger prints to stain the white-gold band. “This was why he wasn’t sure if he should forgive me or not.”

“You spoke to James?” Remus raised an eyebrow.

“A few weeks ago,” she nodded. “I told him that if he can give me two years, I could prove that I wasn’t going to hurt Sirius. If failed that, then I would be willing to say goodbye.”

“That’s reckless.”

Rae laughed. “Funny you said that. Raiden said that same thing.”

“But it’s true. Sirius cares very much as to what James thinks, but I think you should think about what you want too. Not everything has to be a compromise.” Remus tapped at the box’s edge that was facing up to the ceiling. “Clearly Sirius sees you in his future if he’s willing to give you a ring. But I’m not going to pressure you.”

Her shoulders slumped. “It’s a gorgeous ring.”

“Very.”

“It must have cost him a lot…”

“I wouldn’t worry about expense.” Remus assured her. “Just the love that he found for it.”

“I think that this is something I should think about.” Rae sighed. “I’d be an awful girlfriend if I just said yes right off the bat.”

Remus nodded, “Do you want my advice?” She glanced at him. “Tell him that you’ll think about it. He’s not going to feel let down or discouraged. In fact, I think that he’d take pride and respect that you’re thinking about this seriously. Sirius wouldn’t do this for whimsy, and I think that if you tell him that you’re deciding, he’s going to fill up with joy because it means you’re taking him seriously.”

“I used to have a rule. Date for two years, engage for two years, and then marry for forever.” Rae sighed as she gently shut the box. “He’s tossing all that to the wind.”

“Well, you will be sticking with one and that’s the engage for two years.” Remus pointed out to her gently. “Sirius really sees you as his future. He once told me, in confidence mind you, that he once could see you both with children?”

Rae looked pained. “That far….”

“A modest house as well. He refuses to live in an non-magical community. He said that you deserved to be with people that knew you and knew you and your magic well.” Remus smiled softly. “Sunday family gatherings along with the Marauders, so the house is…decently sized.”

“I think my idea of a modest house and Sirius’ idea of a modest house is vastly different.”

“I can garuntee you that it is.” Remus nodded. “So take your time deciding.” he winked at her as the teacher strode in and started writing the text book page on the blackboard and turned around to begin a lecture.

~+~